Tuesday, July 29, 2014

The Manosphere is a Reaction to Women's Abuse of Men

"At the age of 30, Samantha Hess is a professional cuddler. For $60 an hour, she'll intimately snuggle with strangers of all types...about 90% of her clients are men" - Maggie Zhang

I didn't play by society's rules when I was a teenager and in college. I played by my social group's rules, though: we drank, we got high, we partied, we cruised, we picked up girls and got them in the backseat (basically I just grabbed them, and they never said no or protested).

And you know something? I was as grateful as could for all of it. That's why I understand the saying, "Enough is as good as a feast."

We did lots of things I knew were illegal, but so what? Some of my friends were way beyond what I would do, like riding around in a car smoking a bong while knowing perfectly well the cops could get them.

I guess things are different today. Specifically, women's abuse of men, their claiming it isn't abuse and if it is, men deserve it. Hell, if this attitude didn't exist, the Manosphere wouldn't exist.

I was never mean to girls or fell for that Manosphere bullshit about how girls like guys who exhibit the Dark Triad or were "insanely confident." That's just a load of crap.

And yet still I got girls. And as I have said before, in high school I looked like Garth Algar. But I was never ruled by trying to get pussy, and because I wasn't, I had two naked women jump in my bed when I was in college - and things that were close to it.

I didn't "respect" girls and I wasn't "nice" to them. No one told me I was supposed to act like that, and if anyone had I would have thought they were trying to con me.

It makes makes no sense to me to be too nice to people, because there are certain people who will just walk all over you if you act like that.

Once when we were 16, some friends and I were in McDonalds (which at the time was walk-in with no tables, drive-ins or benches outside) when some drunk girl I knew from school was rubbing my back and pressing up against me. I had several such things happen to me. It seemed normal - and, of course, fun.

And I definitely remember being 13 and wrestling with one of my 12-year-old sister's overly-developed 12-year-old friends - and I clearly remember thinking, "OHMIGOD!!!"

Several days ago I read an article about Elliot Rodger, in which some man got some girls to get Elliot down and tickle him. Apparently that was the first time he seemed normal.

Many women had made comments or blogged about how Rodger thought he was "owned sex." Retards didn't get it at all.

I suspect one of his main problems if that he was ostracized and had no one touched him at all. For decades.

I've mentioned before I knew guys in college who were utterly unpopular and spent their weekends alone in their rooms watching TV, in loneliness and isolation and rejection. None of them were right in their heads. They had very little connection to anything. No meaning, no importance, no community. No respect, no validation, no appreciation, no gratitude. Just hope things would get better when they were older.

By the way, confidence comes from external validation (the word "recognize" means "to look twice" and the German "achtung" means "respect, attention."). The other person is a mirror and you see yourself in how they treat you.

I see a lot of hostility in the Manosphere toward women. I understand it, but is isn't normal. Of course, you can certainly expect that reaction if women aren't acting the way they should - abusing men, ignoring them and ostracizing them, lacking gratitude and appreciation, expecting everything but giving little in return, hallucinating "patriarchy" and "oppression."

And the Manosphere does seem to be obsessed with sex, which means many are not getting much - or any. That's not normal, either. And the first time I read the word "incel," I thought, what the hell is that? When I found out what was, I thought, "Oh."

I figure it just doesn't mean "involuntary celibate." It means "ignored, ostracized, not touched because many girls consider me repulsive."

That, I suspect, was one of Rodger's problems, and after decades he went nuts.

When I was in college I had to read a book called Touching, by "Ashley Montague." It was an eye-opener. I already knew about Harry Harlow's experiments with monkeys:

Then there is what it known as Attachment Disorder: "Attachment disorder is a broad term intended to describe disorders of mood, behavior, and social relationships arising from a failure to form normal attachments."

A lot of guys have this, hence the Men Going Their Owny Way or the PUAs. All of it is due to women abusing men and justifying it, so men are "divorcing" women and becoming unattached from them - if they were ever attached to them in the first place.

Apparently many women can't see into the future, not to the extent men can. Unattached men, ostracized and disrespected, ignored and insulted...now where do you think that's going to lead in the long run?

"This professional cuddler is a manifestation of a social pathology brought on by recent changes in human culture. Technology is one of them. Also, the atomization of our culture encourages us to remain single and isolated from the physical touch of others. This trend doesn’t end well." - the Private Man


The Ace said...

Lucky you, having a surplus.

I was one of those types that was constantly rejected overtly and covertly growing up, and have gone (and still am going) years at a time without any physical affection at all from anyone.

I have no idea what causes it.

Unknown said...

I suspect I'm a lot older than you, and we didn't have all bullshit feminism degrading and devaluing men...for no reason at all.

The Ace said...

You probably are older, I'm an 80's kid who grew up in England/Ireland, maybe things were different in America.

While I used to be a romantic, I'm more harsher and colder to women in general now.

Unknown said...

Grew up in the '60s and '70s.

Mark said...

I think your key points are you weren't overtly mean to women, but you didn't supplicate to them like most men do today. You mostly treated them as you would a whiny little sister.

Because feminism has tried to elevate women to near-deity status, which most men fall for, we end up with a dysfunctional barbell strategy: men are either way too nice/weak with women, or they become disillusioned and miscalibrated and begin thinking something like "your teeth are ugly" is a good pickup line. i sense a lot of men in the manosphere are in the latter category.

The greatest sin of feminism is the destruction of healthy male role models and mentors.

Anonymous said...

Legalize prostitution and watch what happens. No shame in paying for women TO GO AWAY.

The Ace said...

Hookers don't give affection, you missed the point completley.

Unknown said...

You pay hookers to go away.

deti said...

"Grew up in the '60s and '70s."

Bob, that explains much of your approach to these intersexual relations issues. You came of age in a society which hadn't yet fully embraced feminism. I came up about 10 to 15 years behind you, in the 80s, where we were in full on feminism -- no fault divorce, women vaunted as the sex which was "more moral" and "more family oriented" and "more in tune with feelings". I also came up in the ridiculously punitive "political correctness" movement, in which men's lives were ruined, men lost jobs, etc. for doing something somewhere some woman didn't like.

You didn't see what I've seen. You didn't experience what I did.

Your age explains much.

deti said...

"you didn't supplicate to them like most men do today."

Men do that today because everyone around them specifically taught them to do that. When it didn't work, we were told "well, you're obviously not doing it right" or "you need to be nicer. Nice is sexually attractive. You're just going for the wrong girls."

It was all bullshit of course, but no one told or taught us anything different.

The Ace said...

Another 80's kid, I can relate to that.

While I get the "you pay hookers to leave" what's the use of it in this context?

Is it being used in a "women would have to be less abusive and mindless" sort of way?

Unknown said...

One poster mentioned about legalizing prostitution, and I quoted Charlie Sheen: You may hookers to go away.

I used to drive a taxi and got to know several: they don't have hearts of gold and are in fact mercenary.

outsider said...

I seem to be alone in thinking this, but it could be a symptom of a terrible male surplus caused by increased lifespans or serial monogamy or immigration. Things may get interesting in India and China.