Wednesday, July 23, 2014

"Surrounded by Hostile Depraved Feminists"

I have found that feminists, in fact all leftists, are hostile and indeed depraved (I got that phrase from here).

I used to read a lot of science fiction between 11 and 14 years old so years later I was surprised to find the Samuel R. Delany was not only a homosexual who wrote about Bondage and Discipline, but also wrote in 1969 a horrendously perverted novel called Hogg.

I was never much of a fan of Delany, even at 12. I was not a fan at all of the late Marion Zimmer Bradley, none of those fiction I have ever read.

Now it turns out that she, too was a hostile, depraved, child-abusing feminist married to a pervert. She was married to a man convicted of child sex abuse. Her children have now come out with revelations of which how awful she was.

I have quit reading modern science-fiction because of the leftism in it. There is still a lot of the older stuff I never read, enough to last the rest of my life.

I have for years thought that abuse changes the brain (think PTSD for soldiers) and it's a lot easier to break something than to fix it.

This is from the site StarFire Studio

I will only post the first part and provide a link to the rest.

Secret Keeper No More: An Interview With Mark Greyland

"When I began interviewing Moira Greyland about her experiences with her mother, Marion Zimmer Bradley, I told her that I'd also be interested in interviewing her brother, Mark Greyland. She checked with Mark, he and I chatted, and he graciously agreed. This interview is the result. It was conducted via chat online because that's the best way for me to communicate.

"Mark writes very poetically, and I have edited his responses very little (mostly punctuation for clarity).

"Chris Starfire: I understand that you're also a survivor of your mother's abuse; what's led to you speaking out publicly about your mother's behavior now?

"Mark Greyland: 'Survivor'; what a peculiar word you chose. Adding that to a decision to speak, which was no decision for me at all. To be plain I credit the testimony of Elisabeth Waters (or Reyes or whomever she is choosing to call herself these days) for my speech on the topic.

"Waters was interviewed as a hostile witness in a court case and was questioned about Marion abusing me and my sister. This testimony was published courtesy of Stephen Goldin along with the testimony of my mother and the words of my sister Moira whom you have already spoken with (they remembered things that I had said before and quoted me).

"A few days after her email reply started making a lot of noise, Moira came to me to say that she was being believed; everybody was talking about what happened to us and how things that I said were confirming what she was saying.

"There was no decision about current timing. This is something I said a long time ago suddenly making a difference. It should be apparent that I was not seeking out the attention. I had changed my name and was trying my best to keep out of the spotlight and am honestly distressed by the whole affair going viral.

"CS: What form(s) did your mother's abuse towards you take, if you'd feel comfortable discussing that?

"MG: Questions such as that are totally charged minute by minute - I have no way to convey to you what that means. Comfortable? Impossible. Safe? I have no idea how to phrase that in a meaningful manner. I live in an echo chamber where memories of yesterday can swell up into thunderstorms of thought and go rolling through my troubled valleys like a drunken Zeus hurtling thunderbolts in every direction laughing to raise the dead. And it does, corpses of memory before me shaking to the Monster Mash and filling my eyes with what I try so hard not to see.

"Physical. Absolutely. But that is so much easier to bear than head games. Screaming is bad, but little whispers and threats work so much better to chill your blood and recreate being cold and naked hiding under tables hearing the shouting. To be "Bone Chewing Bear", robbing the plates of every scrap of food you could find. Life got better as I got older and there was more money, but the earth could turn any day to seeing the big cat stalking in her skin. I flinch from hands and eyes and am very polite and patient day by day by...

"Mental. My god, I have no way to say this. Words work so well on me; before long the raised hand I am cowering from becomes reflex. The face is the face of guessing moment by moment what she would bring. As I got older humiliation and embarrassment became the thing and more and more indirectly as time went by.

"There was no believing she was getting better as you could not tell which one of her would wake up at any moment. It is so much easier to bear being hurt yourself than being blamed for someone hurting someone else. The shame from that alone is this boulder I have hanging around my neck.

"CS: In what ways have you been affected by the abuse you experienced?

"MG: Day by day, hour by hour by ... you have to be joking.

"I flinch. My reflex to be quiet when bad things happen is so profound I was unable to scream when a gentleman broke into our house and stole the television while I was standing back pressed against the wall trembling.

"My reflexes are all wrong and I am working every day to create normal behavior. But fear is my companion, moment by moment. I flinch at loud noises, at traffic sounds, doors slamming, sudden cries of the young.

"I trance out and visions fill me at the drop of a hat, then the cold spot from everything you agreed to being a joke and the sound of screams rise and I'm balling up and 'too late, too late could I have done more' wars with 'she never listened anyway you are nothing and the pain for her rises and ….'

"I speak in poetry and melodrama to shield myself from having to say any of this. I make up a me and let it play for you. I've gotten so good at it I can just go hide in the corner while my fingers type and my mind runs on. I can write for facts and I can also write for feelings. Those feelings are over there and I don't have to handle them except in lines of print. I polish the lines of words until it becomes the music and songs that let me hide."

Read the rest HERE

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