Friday, November 8, 2013

How to Spot a Good Woman

"If something cannot go on forever, it will stop." - Herb Stein

Believe it or not, she'll not only make you a sammich, she enjoys doing so. An added bonus is that she likes to cook - unless you want to spend the rest of your life going to McDonalds or some other fast food places.

When I was in middle school all the boys were required to take shop (stupid and boring in my case, because I made the world's most expensive lopsided ashtray) and the girls were required to take home economics (incidentally, I asked if the boys were required to take it, the whole class roared and the teacher rolled her eyes up in her head). So if she doesn't have the minimum home economics skills (which a guy should have, too, unless he wants to eat over the sink and wear his underwear until it falls off) you might consider that a warning flag.

There is a joke, which I hear from comedians all the time, is that a man cannot win an argument with a woman because he operates on reason and she operates on feelings and so will wander all over the place. That actually is true so find a woman who doesn't enjoy the drama of arguing - and good Lord, how many times have I seen that.

Police, more than anything else, hate domestic disturbances. Emotions run too high and it's hard to calm people down. I've known men who knew what to do - "You want to argue - fine. Argue with yourself. I'm walking out the door."

I've seen men do that (I've done it) and women are flabbergasted. "Where are you going?!?" (No answer, out the door.) Then their attitude is changed when you come back.

I can't remember where I read this, but a man driving his wife in the car (and apparently she was a real shrew) accidentally left her at a gas station. When he realized she wasn't in the back seat he went back, thinking she was going to kill him. Instead she was contrite and apologetic, horrified since she thought he had left her on purpose.

I knew a man who did this to his wife, who was returned home by the police. She was much nicer for a long time.

In any relationship one is going to be more dominant than the other. There is no such thing as equality. It does not exist. So the man is supposed to be more dominant - and that is exactly what patriarchy is about.

Some don't even now what dominance means anymore. I've read the expression "amused mastery." Here's an example: a few weeks ago I encountered an old woman, who appeared to be about 80, and who insisted I say "please." I took one of her hands in both of mine, squeezed it, said, "Pretty please with sugar on top and a cherry." She got a big smile on her face, dropped her eyes, and squeezed by hand back. That's dominance - and we actually need a different, and better, word.

Dominance is when you can disarm them and get them to do what you want...and I have disarmed women by getting on my knees and kissing their hand. Every time, they have melted.

And charm and confidence will often trump looks...unless you are some obese neckbeard. That can be fixed.

Actually the Four Cardinal Virtues is a good guide: Courage (confidence!), Justice, Self-Control, Temperance. These are not religious but good practical wisdom that runs back to at least the ancient Greeks.

If a woman makes more money than the man, that's a big no no. It means she's in change. Unfortunately, society has been set up to make sure many woman make more money than the man, and that causes some big problems.

If a man cannot make a decent living today it is not his fault. High-paying blue-collar jobs have been exported (and these days, white collar ones, too) and Affirmative Action means "White Men Need Not Apply for These High-Paying Make-Work Jobs We Create for Marginally Competent Woman and Incompetent Minorities."

I will build a $2000 house in a rural area before I buy a modern house. And if she can't see what is coming and live with you like that, she's not worth it.

The quality of modern woman has gone down - a lot. There is little of what there is supposed to be in a successful relationship - respect, gratitude, appreciation. Supporting a guy through the good times and bad.

Instead what we get is, "That's nice what you've done for me. What are you going to do next?"

Men are creators, fixer-uppers. Women are receptive/reactive. And ultimately, they'll do what they're told. Unfortunately, they're being told what to do by stupid women with bad ideas.

It got the point a long time ago - like when I was 21 - that I told women: "This is how it's going to be. I will listen to you, but ultimately I make the decisions because I am more rational than you and I am not not going to allow you to put your harebrained schemes into effect. If you don't agree with this, then maybe this relationship isn't meant to be."

If she won't agree to that, well, maybe that relationship really isn't meant to be. And not surprisingly, many women will acquiesce to it. They find they're happier that way - and modern women are much less happier they were in the past.

Modern society is set up to destroy relationships. It won't last, of course.