Notice that Reed uses the word "matrimony" in addition to "marriage." "Matrimony" isn't used anymore, but it means "the rite, ceremony, or sacrament of marriage." If you'll look at marriage certificates from, say, the 1890s they say "Holy Matrimony."
It is a ceremony and is supposed to be a Rite of Passage," which it isn't anymore, not really. Sacrament? Not even close.
Matrimony is supposed to be a sacred bond. Again, not even close.
Now who did this? Well...since women screw up everything they got involved in, and marriage now benefits women far more than men...I'll let you guess. Except for the fact men let them do it.
I've had two women tell me in the past few years that "men are responsible for all the problems in the world." It's true, you know, because they've treated women as adults and instead many have turned into children. Which is the baseline state for many of them when they're allowed to sink.
This article of of course from Fred Reed and is from his site HERE.
A Movable Concentration Camp
If you are a young man, and contemplate matrimony with the love of your life, it is well to look at marriage from the standpoint of reason rather than sentiment. Men are, after all, male, and occasionally capable of reason. The first question to ask yourself is: Why marry? What would you gain? Would your troubles disappear? Would sex be better? Would food be more savory? Would you get tax breaks, enjoy more freedom? Do stock options come with marriage?
Is there any practical advantage at all?
For you, I mean. For her, the advantages are considerable, and the drawbacks few. Your salary will allow her an upscale house, something more important to her than to you, which on the odds she will get in the divorce. Marriage locks-in child support. Since men die younger, she will get to pick your bones. For her, it is a good deal.
For you, no. Marriage has one purpose only, which is to get her legal hooks into you. Do not forget that American women, under the evanescent ivory skin, are eternally adolescent spoiled brats, feminine as a wrestler's jockstrap and primed, as soon as life's inevitable shocks come, to blame men for their unhappinesses. That means you.
Do not dismiss the foregoing as clever cynicism. Nobody goes into marriage expecting divorce, but it comes very frequently, and she really does get the house and the children. In divorces, men lose. Your child support will be based on what the judge thinks you should earn—this is called “imputed income”—so that, if you are a stock broker, you cannot decide that you would rather work on a fishing boat in the Caribbean. If the judge thinks you may be a flight risk, she can confiscate your passport. Your wife’s lawyer may advise her to accuse you of sexually molesting the children. (So help me, this happens. In a divorce, the man wants to get out, the wife to get even.) You may be denied visitation.
In the eyes of the court, the children are her property, to be done with as she chooses. She may remarry with an Air Force colonel she met in a meat bar, and be stationed in Okinawa. So much for your kids.
She can ruin you at any moment. Can and, not unlikely, will. When the moment comes, you will be astonished at how much she knows about divorce law, how vicious she can be. In marriage, you are betting your future on the flip of a loaded coin.
The sensible conclusion is that you are better off single, building a career or whatever you want in life, and dating such flowers as drift by.
Should you marry, the pleasure will be fleeting. Remember that women work on the principle of bait, switch, and fade. From fifteen to, say, twenty-five, they are dreams afoot, cute, with perfect skin and aerodynamic lines. That is what you think you are marrying. Add five or ten years, ten or twenty pounds, and the lack of any reason to continue being charming—and you are going to spend the rest of your life with it. Too many men marry the package, and only discover the content when it is too late.
Matrimony is seldom a happy state in America. Given that something like half of marriages end in divorce, you can bet that a lot of others almost do. Of the remainder, probably more are contented than happy. Resignation is not pleasant, but often the best you can hope for.
Live with her if you must, but don’t marry her. A woman cohabiting has at least some incentive to be agreeable. A married woman does not. Worth pondering is that, in a time of declining economy, feckless government, and political instability, the fewer responsibilities you attach to yourself, the better.
The very idea of marriage is problematic. In many ways, men and women are incompatible. Exceptions and degrees, yes, but on average women are more domestic, materialistic, fearful, totalitarian, and comfortable with routine. This means that to the extent you have masculine interests, you will find her to be an anchor. This doesn’t mean only that she won’t like that awful motorcycle or that noisy Corvette thingy. She won’t want to live in a small condo in the funky part of town, go to the shooting range, or scuba dive.
It is said that marriage rests on compromises, but in fact it rests on concessions, and you will make all of them. You will find your social life gravitating fast to other married couples. She won’t want you to have single female friends (nor will you want her to have single male friends: Marriage is based on mistrust.). Worse, she won’t want you to have single male friends. She will want you where she can keep an eye on you. Forget going out with the guys.
Children, which she will persuade you that you want, on thought you probably don’t want. They are an ungodly burden until they reach adolescence, at which point they become ungodly monsters, before leaving for university and becoming ungodly expenses. Babies are cute, but they smell, make noise, and require constant attention.
You may well find that you do not particularly like your children. You probably have certain tastes in regard to character, intelligence, and so on. Your children may not have these qualities. In romantic theory you should love them because they are yours. In practice you have to say that you do.
One reads today that young men have turned to pornography and masturbation instead of having a normal, healthy interest in women—“normal,” and “healthy” according to women. This is debatable. A man who sits home choking his chicken does not have to put up with irrational behavior, unreasonable demands, PMS, nutty mood swings, “relationship” talk, or unending expense. Masturbation seldom involves separation. Even an American judge is unlikely to award child support for imputed children. Porn offers more variety that the average girlfriend. In terms of cost and benefit, flogging the bishop can make much more sense.
If you look at marriage analytically, you see that it is designed entirely to benefit her, not you. It is a raw deal. In return for bad sex, you tie yourself to a rapidly aging, plumping member of a sex that doesn’t like you, has little in common with you, and will control every aspect of your life until the breakup. Ask yourself, “Do I really like talking to her as much to guys, or am I attracted only to her pearly skin, her ruby lips, and other short-term investments?” Or, “If she were male, would I think she was interesting?”
Conservatives rumble about the declining white population, the need to keep up with the Chinese, and the economy’s dependence on housing starts. You might respond, “Bugger off.” It isn't your problem. You owe nothing to a society that stacks the deck against you. Eat, drink, and be merry, for tomorrow we die.
8 comments:
Want to keep the wife happy? Be miserable or risk divorce
Read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-1280077/Want-wife-happy-Be-miserable.html#ixzz3a71Zw4da
Follow us: @MailOnline on Twitter | DailyMail on Facebook
The problem with marriage today (which was sort of addressed in the article but not plainly stated)...is the mindset 'what will I get out of it'. Matrimony isn't supposed to be like that. It's supposed to be 'how will I sacrifice for my spouse and children today'. In the modern narcissistic society, combined with the unjust family courts, that's pretty much poison for marriage.
Now either sex can certainly be narcissistic...but women are given steroids on narcissism in this society. I wonder when we'll figure out that men going narcissistic as a response isn't going to solve the problem.
Earl - I agree with your assessment concerning both men, women and narcissism. They are all headed for empty shallow meaningless lives with a posse of enablers whom they believe are "like minded spirits." It's an elevator going down.
Tis better to have never loved,
than to have loved and lost it all in a frivolous divorce
"Now either sex can certainly be narcissistic...but women are given steroids on narcissism in this society."
Corrected for accuracy--Both sexes are narcissistic, with a man or woman displaying that tendency depending upon the situation. Ultimately, however, it is impossible to exactly pinpoint what is more or less narcissistic given the complexity of human nature.
Human nature isn't that complex.
Human nature is selfish and narcissistic. Weak and sinful.
Fred Reed is a hypocrite. He is married to a vibrant and takes bennies from the gummint. Yet, he is offering "advice" not to marry.
"Human nature is selfish and narcissistic. Weak and sinful."
Exactly, both men and women, equally, can be narcissistic. Finally, Earl, you make some sense.
"Fred Reed is a hypocrite. He is married to a vibrant and takes bennies from the gummint. Yet, he is offering "advice" not to marry."
Fred Reed was shot in both eyes as a Marine in Vietnam. He is now blind in one eye and not doing so good in the other.
He's earned the right to do as he pleases without you offering your opinion.
Now that is "corrected for accuracy."
Post a Comment