Wednesday, September 17, 2014

"Fertility math? Most women flunk, survey finds"

I don't know where women ever got the idea they could play around with their make-work careers and then get married and have kids at 30 or later. Little do they know...

This article is from Today Health and written by JoNel Aleccia.

"From the outside, Holly Finn certainly looks fertile.

"With shoulder-length dark hair, smooth skin and a slim but curvaceous figure, the San Francisco-area writer could be any young mom with a baby on her hip.

"But at 43, Finn says, her ovaries know better — and she would have, too, if not for what she believes is society’s widespread ignorance about infertility.

“'I really feel that there are important pieces of information that don’t get passed along,' says Finn, who has now tried for four years to conceive through in-vitro fertilization. “I actually think it’s quite a brutal dishonesty.”

"Most women aren't taught — and don't learn — basic facts about fertility and aging, says Finn, author of the e-book The Baby Chase. Instead, celeb moms the likes of Salma Hayek (a baby girl at 41), Marcia Cross (twins at 44) and Mariah Carey (twins at 41) make being an older mom look easy — and glamorous.

“'It’s not that we’re stupid,' she says. 'It’s that we’ve been misinformed.'

"As proof, she points to a new fertility awareness survey sponsored by biopharmaceutical firm EMD Serono Inc., with investigators from RESOLVE, the National Infertility Association. It was presented at the American Society of Reproductive Medicine’s recent annual meeting.

"The poll of 1,000 women ages 25 to 35 who had talked to doctors about fertility found that participants could correctly answer seven out of 10 basic questions less than half the time. The Fertility IQ 2011 Survey found that women were wrong most often about how long it takes to get pregnant — and about how much fertility declines at various ages.

“'We were not at all surprised,' says Barbara Collura, executive director of RESOLVE. 'This is what we experience every day.'

"Most women simply don’t realize that at 30, a healthy woman has about a 20 percent chance of conceiving per month and by the time she reaches 40, her odds drop to about 5 percent, Collura said.

"Instead, many of those surveyed thought that a 30-year-old woman would have a 70 percent chance of conceiving and that a 40-year-old’s chances could approach 60 percent.

"They also believed that a 20-year-old woman might get pregnant in less than two months of unprotected sex, rather than the five months that is the average.

“'It’s basic biology and basic knowledge of how age impacts your fertility if you’re a woman,' says Collura.

"But most women aren’t getting those basics until it’s too late, said Dr. William Schoolcraft, medical director of the Colorado Center for Reproductive Medicine in Denver and two other locations.

"They don't even come in for fertility treatment until they're literally in their 40s," he said. "Some come in and they have run out of time.'

"In a country where sex education focuses primarily on avoiding pregnancy and preventing sexually transmitted diseases, most women believe that having a baby is inevitably easy.

"But that neglects the reality that infertility affects some 7.3 million women in the United States, or 12 percent of the child-bearing female population, and about 1 in 8 couples, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. After about age 35, fertility plummets, Schoolcraft said.

"So when women decide they want to get pregnant and can’t, they’re stunned. Some of the shock is because of advances in health and beauty that allow women to look — and feel — younger, even as their reproductive systems march on.

“'People kind of think now at 40 what they used to think at 30,' Schoolcraft said. 'People do yoga and they run and they do all these healthy things. They assume that means ‘I’m not aging.’ But their eggs don’t know that.'

"Part of the disconnect is because of advances in infertility treatment, which have helped boost the rates of births among women in their 40s, even as rates have dropped for younger moms. Between 2008 and 2009, births in women aged 20 to 24 reached a record low, falling 7 percent. At the same time, the rates for women aged 40 to 44 jumped 3 percent and births to women older than 50 climbed 5 percent.

"Those numbers are exemplified by a series of high-profile births in older celebrities, including icons such as Kelly Preston (son at 48), Holly Hunter (twins at 47) and Jane Seymour (twins at 44.)

"The famous mamas may or may not disclose whether they’ve used fertility aids, such as IVF or donated eggs, says Schoolcraft. That further contributes to the notion that it’s never too late to have a baby.

“'It sends the message, if she can do it, then Miss Healthy Boring Me, I won’t have any trouble at 41 or 42,' Schoolcraft says.

"The trouble is, such thinking can cheat a woman out of her options, Collura says. It’s one thing to postpone children in order to pursue education or a career, fully knowing it might be more difficult to get pregnant later. It’s another thing to be surprised by infertility."

Why I Live Off of Women

When I graduated high school the blue-collar, working-class guys went to work at the local steel mills and started at what today would be about $30,000. In five years they were making about $75,000. I didn't work there because I would have been driven nuts.

Those high-paying blue-collar jobs are gone, gone, gone, thanks our traitorous, back-stabbing government.

So I went to college, believing the con that college degrees translated into higher pay. Now that's certainly true if you have an in-demand degree, but otherwise, nope.

So I decided to live off of women. Since I'm one of those semi-psychopathic "Dark Triad" guys I don't have much of a conscience, and I'm incapable of love but only manipulation, but I decided, what the hell.

So I started targeting older, sick women with money, conned them into leaving most of their money to me, and when they died I got the money. Once I got a car. I've inherited all kinds of stuff, most of which I sold.

This happened only twice, but I got enough money so I never have to work again.

It's even gotten better recently, although I don't make any big scores anymore.

Let's say I'm a deadbeat playboy.

Since men have been pushed out of the workforce, and women are more favored for jobs, there are plenty of single women out there with money. What am I supposed to do? Work two minimum-wage jobs so I can live in a studio apartment and go to food pantries to eat - by bus?

Of course I lie to them and make up I got lucky in stocks and stuff, and that's why I'm retired. And I've found the best way to treat them is to not take any shit of them whatsoever. After all, they are easily replaced. And I have replaced them, too, after I got what I wanted.

I knew about this "Game" stuff even before the Internet was around.

Of course I had to give up family and children, since it hasn't been possible to really have those for years, but, well, I have a fair amount of money. And I got get some kicks out of dominating and manipulating susceptible women.

Now if you get lucky enough to find a good woman, and a good job, and you end up with home and children, then more power to you.

But for those of us who were denied all those things - what Freud called "work and love" - there are consolations. I just wrote about what I have done.

As Willie Nelson sang in "Night Life": "It ain't no good life, but it's my life."

"The Motivation Trifecta: Autonomy, Mastery, and Purpose"

"Everyone wants to make money and everyone wants to be free." - Bold and Determined

I've known about "autonomy, mastery and purpose" for quite a while. I've owned business and used it on people. I have found it works on personal relationships.

I and many others have pointed out feminism is about the attempt to dominate, manipulate and control men. I call it the Dark Triad for women. It's the exact opposite of the Motivational Trifecta.

I put it this way: you get eudaimonia though excellence, and you get excellence through autonomy, mastery and purpose. This includes relationships with the "opposite" sex.

This article is from a site with a not-so-surprising name: Delivering Happiness. It was written by Janet Choi


"Money isn’t the most powerful or effective motivator. Back in the 1970’s, psychologist Edward Deci ran an experiment showing how incentivizing students with money to solve puzzles actually made them less interested in working on them after being paid. Meanwhile, another group of students who hadn’t been offered money, worked on the puzzles longer and with more interest. Deci’s work uncovered the powerful and significant difference between extrinsic motivation, the kind that comes from outside sources, and intrinsic motivation, the kind that comes from within yourself.

"So how do you attain that intrinsic motivation? Daniel Pink, in his book, Drive, lists three elements of the motivation formula: autonomy, mastery, and purpose. In situations where people are paid fairly, this trio drives, engages, and stimulates us to do our best work.

"Here’s the breakdown:

Autonomy

"Our self-direction is a natural inclination. Pink points to the simple example of how children play and explore all on their own. We’re all built with inner drive.

"Deci, and his colleague Richard Ryan, have continued to explore the nature of what’s called self-determination theory, a theory of motivation that takes into account people’s psychological needs. They discovered in a study of workers at an investment bank that managers who offered 'autonomy support' — which means helping employees make progress by giving meaningful feedback, choice over how to do things, and encouragement — resulted in higher job satisfaction and better job performance.

"Workplaces can support autonomy by giving people real control over various aspects of their work — whether it’s deciding what to work on or when to do it.

Mastery

"We want to get better at doing things. It’s why learning a language or an instrument can be so frustrating at first. If you feel like you’re not getting anywhere, your interest flags and you may even give up. A sense of progress, not just in our work, but our capabilities, contributes to our inner drive.

"Employers should look at calibrating what people must do by looking at what they can do. If the must-tasks are too difficult, people will become worried and feel out of their league. If the must-tasks are too easy, they’ll will get bored.

"The must-tasks should be just right. So Pink concludes that we should work on Goldilocks tasks, which are neither too difficult nor too easy. The trick is not to give tasks fitting a person’s exact capabilities, but to give them space and support to reach a little higher to foster improvement, continual mastery, and growth. What this requires of employers is paying more attention to how employees are doing and feeling about their tasks in order to avoid keeping square Bob or triangle Mary from trying and losing heart at fitting into round tasks.

Purpose

"People who find purpose in their work unlock the highest level of the motivation game. Pink says that it’s connecting to a cause larger than yourself that drives the deepest motivation. Purpose is what gets you out of bed in the morning and into work without groaning and grumbling — something that you just can’t fake.

"That also means people who have purpose are motivated to pursue the most difficult problems. Elizabeth Moss Kanter, Professor at Harvard Business School, has formulated her own trio of motivating factors, one of which is meaning, which helps people go the extra mile and stay engaged. 'People can be inspired to meet stretch goals and tackle impossible challenges,' she writes, 'if they care about the outcome.'

"Russell Benaroya, co-founder and CEO of EveryMove, a fitness rewards program, agrees. 'We are on a mission to give people a strong voice to show that their healthy lifestyle matters,' he explains. 'Employees get up for that in the morning. They overcome obstacles for that. They care about something that is much bigger than themselves.' The benefit that the EveryMove team experiences is the resilience and sustainable fuel to keep moving. 'All companies face their own roller coaster of business ups and downs. True purpose allows those swings to create less whiplash and distraction for the team.'

"What can employers do? Help employees connect to something larger than themselves. Get them out of mere measurement by numbers and figures, and connect work to people and values. Providing patient photos, for example, to radiologists, who have little direct contact with patients, improved their performance.

"Why is the motivation trifecta especially relevant?

"According to Pink, the old-school model of carrots and sticks is becoming increasingly outdated, and according to lots of research, just plain wrong.

"It makes sense that old-school organizational and personal frameworks of productivity just don’t cut it in this age when knowledge work, creativity, and problem-solving are required to stand out and succeed. Here’s to building more autonomy, mastery, and purpose to produce not just a more productive and effective workforce, but a happier one!"

Tuesday, September 16, 2014

Some Truly Terrifying Comments

This is the article (it's a long one) and below are the comments. (There are 377 of them, and all of them are like the ones below.)

Rock71

"Young men watched their mothers divorce their fathers and saw them pay their mothers for the privilege. In today's anti-male environment it doesn't pay to get married and become a father. Back in the day,we had a social contract. If a man worked hard to provide for the family, he was rewarded with their emotional support. Now,if he marries and divorces,he will have to pay alimony and child support. In other words, he has the responsibility of providing without the reward of their emotional support. If women were struggling we would be seriously looking at what was discouraging them. When men are reluctant to grow up we say 'why won't these guys grow up'! It isn't s serious asking. It is more 'what's their problem'! Young men like me who grew up during the girl power years have been made to feel like 'less thans' simply because of our gender. Nearly everyone,including the author of this article aren't truly concerned about young men. They are more concerned with shaming them,then truly finding out why so many of them are hurting.Young men in their twenties commit suicide at six times the rate of women in their twenties,but the only concern is: damn it,men! Get over it so young women will have someone to marry!"

Avatar

"I'm a guy in his early 20s and i say screw having a serious relationship I've seen how my mother and sisters have treated my father I know he might not have been the best dad but last 10 years all it's been is degrade.degrade.degrade f that i'd rather place my shotgun up to my head and blow my brain out with a three inch magnum"

Bill "I would rather play video games and watch porn all night than having an angry and entitled princess rule my life.

And no... sex isn't worth it."

Steven B Bill

"sex isn't a given in marriage anymore.... Women screw higher value men when they are single and then aren't happy with their equal when they marry so usually are not sexually attracted to them. Honestly, porn is better then a 30+ year old aging, nagging woman that is turning into a land whale. Why would any man pay full price for a used car that other men got to drive for free when the car was new. If the whores want to practice price discrimination on me, expect to get led on. Women loose a lot of power when they age and they are going to loose a hell of a lot more power soon once men get a birth control pill which feminists have been lobbying against for years because they will loose the power to trap men when they want to have kids."

Kitty

"Bill, how right you are!

I am a woman (35) but I valued my freedom very high all my life. Funnily enough this article could be written about me. I also love spending time in Internet, listen to music and watch (mostly gay) porn.)"

Yan

"Long article. I waited in vain for it to get to the point.

If every game in town is a "wimmin's game" with the odds always fixed artificially in their favour, why would men want to play? There's no incentive.

"Men that live with their parents and play video games are considered immature. Because maturity is defined by women in terms of their willingness to serve women.

"It's not rocket science."

Steven B Yan

"bingo, It is not my duty to slave away for someone. Should I choose to do it, that is one thing but honestly I see no reason to. Women have flings with higher value men all throughout college and their earlier 20s and then when they go looking for relationships right as they start to age and loose their looks they can only get their equal and when you have been test driving BMWs your whole youth, you don't appreciate the Toyota that you can afford and frankly the men that were ignored have no interest in paying full price for a very used car that others got to lease for free when the car was new and had less millage. If your so equal then "man up" and get a better paying job if you want kids and a family. It may have taken men 50 years to respond to feminism but you can bet your diamond ring that we have caught on and you are about to see our response and it isn't going to end anytime in your lifetime."

anonymous

"men are boycotting a corrupt system.

"My ex wife gets to enjoy alimony while living with another man because she is "entititled" to a living standard from a marriage she walked out on.

"You can only screw men over for so long until they quit participating in the game."

sanddust

"Agreed. I am a 44 year old female who for years has been warning both men and women of what you described. I remember well the tee shirts with sayings plastered across them "Anything boys can do girls can do better" and "Princess in training" They were blatant attempts at devaluing the genuine and BEAUTIFUL healthy male/female relationship. It worked! Please don't give up! There ARE women out there who will be supportive and loyal. Women who allow men their dignity as MEN. But you must do the same for women. BE a man. Accept nothing less than a real woman who understands and embraces her place as one in nature. They do exist. Good luck to you."

Steven B

"tell all the young men you know what happened to you and explain to them what laws and social changes have led to this so they know they should not expect their grandparents marriage."

Dan

"Maybe if men werent devalued by rampant feminism in every aspect of society, and the entire role of the husband and father in our civilization wasn't revoked to please militant feminists, maybe if women weren't favoured for jobs and positions to promote gender equality in the workplace, I might want to go out and get a job, and raise a family. As it is, because of ridiculous laws that favour women, I can be accused of rape with no evidence at all and treated as a rapist untill I am cleared, losing my job, family and friends. I be divorced with no fault at all, lose my children, property and income in that no-fault divorce, be roped into paying child support for children I'm not allowed to see in that same divorce, go to prison because I can't afford to pay that child support. I can fall in love with a woman, and have her destroy my entire life out of nothing more than boredom, take my children, tear apart my family, take my house, my property and my income, even destroy my reputation, and I don't have to have done anything wrong. Society teaches women that men aren't feeling..."

Realiti

"Social contracts. The contract of chivalry is very different from that of equality. The women these days would like to have the perks of both and responsibilities of neither. Understandable, but nobody's standing up to say "no bloody way." I am supposed to treat women as my equal... until a ship is sinking, then it's women first. I'm supposed to make the exact same wages as a woman on a job, but I'm supposed to pay for her meal on a date. It's "a woman's body" when she considers an abortion - my views don't matter. When she decides not to abort and demand child support from me, it's my duty - even if I told her to have an abortion. Frankly, that's bullshit. Unequal status under chivalry was a reflection of unequal responsibility. Equal status, equal responsibility. Ladies, woman-up. You're equal. It's the 21st century. You're well past the fainting couch."

John

I'm 50. I've read this article. Ignore every single word of it. There is almost no upside in buying into being a husband, father, "responsible man" in the society we live in. Pursue your pleasures.

"When Education Goes Wrong"

When one of my nephews was about six or seven he had this obsession with a cartoon character named "Bravestarr." He even talked his mom into sewing him a costume, which he wore around the house.

What was he doing? Practicing to be a grownup. Practicing to be a hero.

The book listed above? Amazon had this to say about it: "Children choose their heroes more carefully than we think. From Pokémon to the rapper Eminem, pop-culture icons are not simply commercial pied pipers who practice mass hypnosis on our youth. Indeed, argues the author of this lively and persuasive paean to the power of popular culture, even trashy or violent entertainment gives children something they need, something that can help both boys and girls develop in a healthy way. Drawing on a wealth of true stories, many gleaned from the fascinating workshops he conducts, and basing his claims on extensive research, including interviews with psychologists and educators, Gerard Jones explains why validating our children's fantasies teaches them to trust their own emotions and build stronger selves."

The purpose of play and heroes is for children to work though certain fears and become stronger for it. When I was a kid we used to ride our bikes ten miles away, engage in dirt-clod fights, jump off of cliffs into lakes and God knows what else. I've got scars all over me. And we were better for it - braver and stronger and more confident and competent. I see much of that missing today.

Most of our education was not in school.

The Purpose of Women is to Serve Men

For a long time it's been men serving women, which isn't natural and makes both unhappy. This humorous video explains why.

Let's put it this way: the masculine traditionally protects the feminine and the feminine nurtures the masculine. We have the former but when was the last time the latter did its job?

Demon Girls

At their worst men and women are Satanic...just in different ways. They can be monsters. In the West, the easiest way to see the good and bad is to read the Bible, in spite of ignorant comments about "I'm not interested in anything written by a Spook in the Sky/Invisible Sky Daddy/cave dwellers 2000 years ago." They're missing a lot of wisdom about how people act. As I've mentioned before, read the story of Jezebel. Or look at Samson.

Unfortunately, mythologically, women are the ones who bring evil into the world. These days, you can see their worst aspects in movies, novels and video games. And as Ezra Pound noted, "The artist is the antenna of the human race."

This is from SpeakeasyX

"Perhaps it is simply a trend brought on by the early aughts and the commercial introduction of so-called “J” & “K” horror in America like The Grudge. The Eastern lore is overwhelmed with stories of jilted, abused women returning demonic to exact return judgment—on any and everything in their path.

"So much feminization has happened in the US in the last 30+ years, perhaps it is simply male writers and directors who are actually frightened of the modern shift toward all things feminine. I would be surprised if any ever admitted such a thing, however.

"Or it could be the current fascination with demonic supernatural everywhere. It’s everywhere today, if you’re even bothering to look around. From video gaming to movies and TV, awards shows, music videos, books; darkness rules the day. Symbols to the old gods are now ubiquitous and daring observers to be less ignorant than average and point out the obvious.

"Maybe it’s all three and more. But I have seen an influx of demon girl horror in the last four, maybe five years. I have never been interested in blaming specific people, or their media, for society’s stupidity. However, the message these movies are sending—planned or otherwise accidentally – will have consequences. I can already see those consequences in young women. I’ve seen tantrums from some that boggle the sane mind; both from the standpoint of 1) how do they live with themselves and 2) why does anybody put up with that behavior in a relationship?'