Thursday, December 12, 2013

The Madonna and the Whore

"Knowing that a woman does not belong on a pedestal is not synonymous with believing that she dwells in a sewer." - Athol Kay


One of the problems with the Manosphere is the inability of some to think outside the box. The get so stuck in concepts of "Alpha Fux and Beta Bux," "Alphas," "Betas," "hypergamy," "shit tests" (along with the other religious cult private language) that they cannot realize they are just concepts in our heads we impose on reality, and as such are provisional and can always be refined. "The map is not the territory," as that old saying reminds us.

In fact, this ideally is what science is - it's not the truth; it a search for the truth and concepts it generates can always be refined. I've had people tell me the concepts in the Manosphere are archetypes (nope), shorthand (nope) or, of course, I didn't understand them (which means they do). This is the first defense of the terribly insecure: ad hominem attacks.

When people are convinced they have found the truth and defend it vociferously, it means they were insecure in the first place, found security (but not truth) and so can't change their minds or refine their concepts.

I have pointed out before there are a lot of inaccurate, indeed dangerous, concepts in the Manosphere.

Some of them are the concepts of Alpha/Beta. An Alpha supposedly see the truth about women, that they are hypergamous gold-digging sluts who want "Alpha Fux and Beta Bux" and who are run by their rationalization hamsters. That they'll always dump their husbands if they can trade up, that they are always attracted to Bad Boys, that they are incapable of love, that they have no self-awareness whatsoever of any of these things unless instructed by "enlightened" men.

Betas are supposed to put women on a pedestal and Alphas see them as whores. Even though the "theoreticians" in the Mansphere can't seem to figure it out, these are just the old ideas of the Madonna and the Whore.

The split didn't come from Christianity but was identified by it. I suspect it was identified before Christianity, since this split is created by our inborn narcissism, i.e., our ability to split people into all good and all bad (everyone has narcissistic tendencies). Good Madonnas and Bad Whores.

Our narcissism is what influences us to see ourselves as good and others as bad. What of the worst things about it is that inherent in it is scapegoating, or projection - which is our first defense. "Since I am good and you are bad, you are the cause of all my problems, so I will degrade you, humiliate you and often try to kill you."

For women it is supposed to be idealizing Alphas and despising any man who's not. However, that's what some men think they are, which means they are projecting. They also can't realize they when they claim a woman is "shit testing" them it's the same thing as saying, "Golly, I must be an Alpha!", that is, elevating themselves with no accomplishments. In other words, they think women are idealizing them as "Alphas" when in reality they are only idealizing themselves.

If a woman sees men as "Alphas I love and Betas and everyone else I hate," that woman is a narcissist/borderline/psychopath, and anyone who gets involved with her will regret it, because sooner or later she will devalue him. There is a well-known site Shrink4Men, which deals with the issues these men have with these women.

For that matter, any woman who gets involved with an "Alpha" (sic) must deal with the fact he might be a narcissist/borderline/psychopath.

This is an old concept (that I learned about in college): that women see men as Success Objects, and men see women as Beauty Objects. However, success and beauty are in many ways subjective and not objective, contrary to attempts to make them objective (again, based on our desire for complete security at the cost of our brains and our freedom).

The Manosphere hasn't yet figured out how to heal this split because they don't realize it was healed in the past - to the extent it can be healed.

For on thing, there are two "Alphas," not one. The one who sees women as Whores is the Cad, and my experience has been Cads don't even like women. The one who is the Patriarch/Protector is the true Alpha, not the Cad. The term "Alpha" only confuses. It does not clarify.

One thing figured out by Christianity - and the Hebrews before it - is the meaning of the story of the Garden of Eden. The serpent is a symbol of envy and hate and like all the envious wants to bring the envied down, even if the envier destroys himself.

Adam blames Eve and Eve blames the serpent. It what I mentioned before: it's scapegoating or projection. The denial of self-responsibility and the casting of problems onto innocent people.

The story is telling us that putting someone down is almost always based on envy. Feminism is based on the envy of men, which is why feminism will destroy men even if it destroys itself - which is what it is in the process of doing.

It also points out that women (in general) are more envious than men and that men should not listen to a woman when what she is saying is based on envy. That truth is a hell of a lot more important than all the rest of the concepts in the Manosphere put together. For one thing, there wouldn't be any feminism (and the catastrophic problems it has created) if men had realized what it was. Even now, many still can't see that envy.

The Cad sees women as whores, which mean they degrade women out of envy of them, and Cads will destroy women even if they destroy themselves - which is what they do. I have seen this more than once.

To the extent the Manosphere puts down women as hypergamous gold-digging Alpha-cock-riding whores, it based on the envy of women and so will destroy them even if it destroys itself. It turns women into whores, and any man who sees women as conscienceless, gold-digging whores is courting a boatload of psychological problems. I have seen that, too.

Any man who sees them as Madonnas is also seeking that same boatload.

Not only that, the few women I have known who thought they deserved a rich, handsome man never got them, and instead ended up as man-hating spinsters. Because no man was good enough for them. They had the wrong definitions of "success.

There is a lot of wisdom in the past. If only people pay attention to it.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

This is off topic Bob but I read an article a while back on your blog about how narcissists have a damaged amygdala. This causes them to over react in a narcissistic frenzy and very prone to anxiety attacks. Anyways, when I was on a selfhelp website to improve mysef. I exposed some of my problems and I just really started to panic and froze up. I was raised by a mother who always shielded me from failure and always coddled my ego
Could I be a narcissist or is this typical teenage angst? If it is narcissism what can I do about it?

Bob Wallace said...

That comment about the amydala was on Anonymous Conservative's site (which is a good one).

You're not a narcissist. If you were you wouldn't believe it and it wouldn't even occur to you if you were.

I went though similar things when I was a teenager, as did my friends. It gets better as you get a little older. It's all unnecessary, though, and does have a lot to do with how you raised by your parents, schools, neighborhood, etc.

Even a change of environment can help a lot, like going to college or any other kind of school.