Friday, July 31, 2015

"We Should Never Have The Kind Of Happy Homes In Which We Ourselves Had Been Brought Up"

I read this article several years ago and I have always remembered it, especially since during WWII some women would hand out white feathers to men, which meant the women thought they were cowards for not being in the war.

One pacifist thanked the women and kept the feathers at home as souvenirs. Another man, when handed a feather, took out his fake eyeball (having lost the real one in combat) and dropped it in her hand.

There were also a few cases of boys too young to be in the military - say 15 and 16 - killing themselves after the humiliation of having white feathers mailed to them anonymously.

You think these women would have learned after what happened in WWI.

I was also reminded of what I encountered when I was a newspaper editor. I got an obituary about a woman who had been born in 1899, married in 1916, widowed in 1917 when her husband was killed in WWI - and never remarried, dying in the late 1980s.

I am not mystified, but am often amused at those who support completely unnecessary wars. They never think it is their children who will be killed or mutilated - until they are. And it never occurs to them they are damning other parent's children to death or mutilation - to never be married, to never have children, to never have a home and family, to be alone and ignored. For both men and women.


Here starts the article:


They dreamt of love, marriage and children. But, as a new book reveals, the Great War robbed two million women of the men they would have married, leading many into relationships which could only be whispered about...

One hazy morning in 1917 the senior mistress of Bournemouth High School For Girls stood up in front of the assembled sixth form and announced to her hushed audience: "I have come to tell you a terrible fact.

"Only one out of ten of you girls can ever hope to marry. This is not a guess of mine. It is a statistical fact.

"Nearly all the men who might have married you have been killed. You will have to make your way in the world as best you can.

"The war has made more openings for women than there were before. But there will still be a lot of prejudice. You will have to fight. You will have to struggle."

Long terms statistics show that 35 per cent of women failed to marry during their 'reproductive' years.

Sitting in the assembly hall among her shocked and silent schoolfellows was 17-year-old Rosamund Essex.

She was never to forget those chilling words, recalling: "It was one of the most fateful statements of my life."

When Rosamund, who never married, wrote her memoirs 60 years later she accepted that her teacher's pronouncement had been prophetic.

"How right she was," she recalled. "Only one out of every ten of my friends has ever married.

"Quite simply, there was no one available. We had to face the fact that our lives would be stunted in one direction.

"We should never have the kind of happy homes in which we ourselves had been brought up.

"There would be no husband, no children, no sexual outlet, no natural bond of man and woman. It was going to be a struggle indeed."

Rosamund, and so many of the classmates who sat with her that morning, joined what came to be known as The Surplus Two Million - women whose dreams of marriage and children died alongside their men.

World War I deprived Britain of three-quarters-of-a-million soldiers, leaving as many more incapacitated.

In 1919 a generation of women who unquestioningly believed marriage to be their birthright discovered there were simply not enough men to go around.

The make-up of British society had changed irrevocably - as Isie Russell-Stevenson discovered to her horror.

Towards the end of the war in 1918 she received a message to say that her husband, Hamilton, would be returning home from the Front.

Wearing her prettiest dress, Isie waited eagerly at the docks for his boat to arrive.

But the dreamed-of moment turned suddenly to nightmare.

Hamilton appeared on a stretcher, mangled and clearly dying. Isie took him home and nursed him and not long afterwards he died.

Isie mourned - nevertheless she was young, and the following year she was invited to a ball in London.

She willed herself into the mood, did her hair and put on her ballgown.

But when she walked into the ballroom, the party seemed to be women-only. "But if it's a hen party," she thought to herself, mystified.

"Why is every woman in full evening dress?"

At last, through the crowd, she spotted a man in tails... and again through the crowd another...and then a couple more.

And gradually she realised that this pathetic clutch of males were the men who were left.

There were about ten women to every man.

She recalled: "It's hard to explain. It was as if every man you had ever danced with was dead."

May Jones, the daughter of a carpenter, knew - as she held a letter informing her of her fiance's death - that she would never marry or hold a baby in her arms.

Before the onset of war, May had fallen in love with Philip, a Cambridge scholar who read her poetry.

When Philip - a stretcher-bearer - was due to return home on leave, May was walking on air.

But she wrote in her memoirs: "Then everything was shattered; a letter came from the War Office to say he had been killed in action.

"The shock and loss was terrible, I felt I had lost half of myself, or was it my twin soul? I knew then that I should die an old maid."

She added sadly: "I was only 20-years-old."

Like a generation of other women in post-war Britain, Phyllis Bentley, born in 1894 and raised on fairy tales of love and marriage, headed for the dance halls as the best place to meet and mate.

For the men, the lure of the dance was great; they could take their pick from the prettiest of the bunch.

For the girls, there was the agony of waiting to be asked.

Lack of men meant looks were at a premium.

Phyllis was not pretty, and the competition for partners was fierce, so all too often there were awkward gaps when she was unclaimed and would sit, in the cloakroom, reading her books.

Then one day a man who seemed different from the others asked her to dance. He was, she remembered "large and agreeably ugly. . ."

He also seemed kind, warmhearted and well-read.

Phyllis's heart quickened.

And yet that one foxtrot when her dream took shape was painfully fleeting. She remembered: "For the space of a dance I thought my destiny was settled."

Minutes later, Phyllis's partner rejoined his group. "And I perceived that he was already deeply in love with an old schoolfellow of mine, a more than pretty, intelligent, altogether delightful girl whom I greatly liked.

I perceived also that she was deeply in love with him."

And so the dream ended. Phyllis's ugly man married the pretty schoolfriend within the year.

Not long afterwards, in 1919, Phyllis had her second and final brush with romance.

It lasted a little longer; this time the man paid court to her over several months, but then abruptly got engaged to another girl.

Phyllis Bentley - who never was to marry - was one of the sober statistics of the 1921 census, which showed the imbalance of the sexes.

For those aged between 25 and 29, there were 1,209 single women for every 1,000 men.

When the next census was taken ten years later, 50 per cent of those women were still single.

Long-term statistics showed that 35 per cent of them failed to marry during their reproductive years.

Botched affairs, dashed hopes, the prospect of loneliness; two million women now saw their dreams slipping away from them.

Women like Alix Kilroy, who confided sadly in her diary on her 26th birthday "I seem to want very badly to see some chance of matrimony in the future - for children and the physical side, too."

But other women sought solace among their own sex - with an explosion of lesbian relationships.

Author Sybil Neville-Rolfe noted: "The war left behind it a generation of Eves in an Adamless Eden... Starving for love, deprived of homes and denied the joys of motherhood, many women found in friendship, one with another, some sort of substitute for these normal but lost relationships."

Unlike male homosexuality, lesbianism was not illegal - and a Bill to outlaw it in 1921 failed because MPs considered that it was wiser to sweep the whole issue under the carpet.

In the fashionable clubs of London's West End, women danced cheek to cheek with their female partners - unafraid of being pointed out, because the shortage of men had made this such a common sight.

The writer Esther Harding noted that more and more women seemed to be adopting "a somewhat masculine dress and manner, as well as certain masculine characteristics".

Marie Stopes, the campaigner for women's rights, received many letters from single women agonizing over their lesbian leanings.

In 1922, a Miss L. Redcliffe wrote to her saying: "I have a very strong tendency to be attracted by my own sex.

"I have made great efforts to overcome this - but the force of it is so strong that it seems to me most important that if there is anything I am ignorant of I should have advice..."

Stopes replied: "Keep your mind off the physical side of that aspect as much as possible...I think you will find this phase passes entirely away."

For some, it was a lifesaver.

Denied a husband and family by the war, Elizabeth Goudge nursed her elderly mother.

When her mother died, Elizabeth was racked with loneliness.

A friend arranged a meeting with another single girl - and Elizabeth later recalled: "We looked at each other. I saw a young woman with a head of hair like a horse chestnut on fire, and the white magnolia skin that goes with such hair. She looked young enough to be my daughter...when I went to bed that night I found myself flooded with happiness.

Jessie has stood by me for 21 years and has been the most wonderful event that ever happened to me."

Many lesbians settled down with their chosen partner for a lifetime of tender intimacy.

Alice Skillicorn, principal of a teacher training college in Cambridge, met Dorothy Sergeant in the early 1930s.

By week, Alice lived in college and played out her headmistressy-role to perfection.

But weekends and vacations were different - the couple shared a house.

They remained together for nearly 40 happy years, until Dorothy died in 1969.

Broken-hearted, Alice was finally laid to rest in the same grave, with the tombstone recording their "dear and devoted friendship".

But other spinsters continued with their desperate search for a husband and magazine problem pages in the 1920s dealt with a barrage of letters from women desperate to fill the gap in their lives.

The following answer from the Fireside Friends page in a "Woman's Friend" of 1926 was addressed to "A Lonely Girl".

"I am very sorry that I cannot put you in touch with a young man, my dear, but it is against our rules to give private addresses."

A little further on, the article suggests women might consider emigrating to find a husband.

The sex psychologist Walter Gallichan - a popular voice of the day - urged single women to check the local population statistics when deciding where to go husband-hunting: Sussex and Leicester, he pointed out, were particularly unpromising areas to look for spare men, as they already had a disproportion of married men or surplus women.

Many placed advertisements in the Press in their hope of finding any man - like the following heartfelt plea published during the war: "Lady, fiancè killed, will gladly marry officer totally blinded or otherwise incapacitated by the War."

By 1921 publications like the "Matrimonial Times" were carrying columns of advertisements placed by spinsters and widows.

They included:

MATRIMONY - Spinster, 38, loving disposition, fond of children, entertaining and country life, is anxious to correspond with a wounded officer of cultured tastes, with view to a matrimonial alliance; one with some means.

LADY, aged 49, spinster, cultured, bright temperament, small capital... would like to meet officer or civilian age 45-60... could be very happy with disabled officer needing a cheerful companion and pal.

The stigma of being a spinster was so fearful that many women succumbed to sex, believing they'd get a husband that way. So much so that after the war some wag suggested fixing a plaque to the wall of a famous London hotel, "To the women who fell here during the Great War."

Men could take their pick and were often ruthless. Betty Milton, who was a kitchen maid, felt that at 26 her marriage prospects were receding. Life in service didn't offer many opportunities for meeting men, apart from the boy who delivered the groceries.

She wasn't very keen on him, but started seeing him and eventually agreed to have sex because he promised to marry her. "I began to consider myself left on the shelf, an 'old maid'. . . I hated it but at 26 I was dead scared of losing him." Betty got caught by the man's mother, and her suitor fled.

She was lucky not to get pregnant - society did not tolerate extramarital sex and many unmarried mothers were condemned to asylums, while their babies were put out for adoption or sent to reformatories.

But with headlines like "A Million Women Too Many - 1920 Husband Hunt" from the Daily Mail, many eligible young men became afraid that every woman who approached them, however innocently, was trying to hijack them into marriage.

After her brother Edward was killed in June 1918, the writer Vera Brittain was desperate to learn the particulars of his fate, and relentlessly pursued his injured colonel, who had not only been awarded a VC but was also tall and good-looking.

Despite this, Vera had no interest in him but for his knowledge of Edward's last hours; to this end she haunted his hospital bedside and took every opportunity to get him to talk. But the young colonel was vain, cold and reluctant.

He seemed, she wrote: "Nervously afraid that every young woman he met might want to marry him." The more she pursued him, the more he avoided her. She was never able to get him to divulge what he knew, and finally "lost sight of him altogether".

Whatever became of this self-obsessed young man, we will never know. Suffice to say, his life post-war was probably far happier than the fates of those two million young women for whom love, family and a home of their own had been shot away for ever.

"Class"

I don't use the Manosphere's "social sexual" hierarchy because it's close to worthless since it doesn't describe reality.

Years ago I read a book by the late Paul Fussell called Class, which made me laugh because it was right on the money.

Here are the classes he described:

The upper class, which consists of the top-out-of-sights and the mainstream upper class.

The middle class, broken down into upper-middles and middles.

The proletarian, or working class (proles, for short), consisting of the high, middle, and low proles.

The very bottom classes, the destitute and the bottom-out-of-sight.

Category X, people who withdraw from the class system and live life according to their own rules. (Category X has nothing to do with Generation X.)

One thing I remember him describing are those who live in trailers and have aquariums. I know people like this. They're the "hoosiers" I spoke about (the word being an insult in the area I was raised). Not exactly white trash, but close.

They're always stupid, poor, addicted to drugs and alcohol and drama. The skinny guys are the ones who screw obese women. When the women aren't obese they're still alcoholics or heroin or meth addicts. Both sexes always have an arrest record and sometimes don't have a driver's license.

When you see some scruffy long-haired guy riding his bike down the street, it's because he lost his driver's license. And they're ones you see scrapping two dollars worth of aluminum cans every day.

They're the truly promiscuous ones and their relationships never work out.

Then this is a class I'm not sure exists anymore. They're the working class/blue collar class who worked themselves up to middle class. Those were my parents, who dropped out of high school. My father was a general contractor and my mother worked nights at the local ER.

I never lacked anything.

The reason I don't think this class exists anymore is because the economy is so bad, has been for a long time, and will be for a long time.

Then there is the middle class, which is in big trouble. They're the ones with the middle class houses, new cars, kids in decent public schools.

My parents were middle class and were married from 1956 to 2013, when both died six weeks apart. That's middle class. They're the backbone of the culture.

I am not all the familiar with the rest of the upper classes, but I noticed when owning a taxi that the old rich live in mansions set very far back from the street, in a rural area, with a private road that looks like just a one-lane blacktop road. (These are Fussell's "Out-of-Sights.")

I went down such a street one time to deliver a letter and suddenly there was this mansion.

I've also found those who drove the Porsches and such cars are the middle class who've worked their way up to the moneyed class and think the old rich drive such cars - which they do not.

The middle classes and above don't want anything to do with the lower classes. The's why the police exist, who spend most of the time dealing with the Dalits - a term originally from India and now sometimes used in the U.S. to describe the lowlifes.

I have never in my life met the Manosphere's description of an "alpha," because they don't exist. I have met homicidal men, but they had nothing in common with the homicidal hatred that is supposed to be characteristic of "Omegas."

I have met many bullies, but they weren't "alphas" with "high self-esteem" and "insane self-confidence." They were big-mouth cowards and I've seen them stomped flat in ten seconds by those they picked on - and then seen them beg to left alone and not to be hit anymore. I'm going to repeat that - beg.

The bigger the mouth, the bigger the coward. The truly scary guys are the quiet ones.

As for my class, very few can tell what I am, and that upsets some people because they cannot pigeonhole me.

The Manosphere's "social-sexual" hierarchy was created by men with little experience in life. I am astonished by the delusion and naivete I encounter.

Wednesday, July 29, 2015

Hoosiers Unlimited

I was raised middle-class but there were a lot of lower-class people in my town. I got to know them quite well. For one thing, you couldn't escape them and their drama, which was the purpose of their meaningless lives.

The bottom were the white trash, who were addicted to heroin and meth, unemployed, and had been in and out of prison. When out of prison they always had warrants out on them.

The next rung up were the hoosiers. Originally it meant someone from Indiana, but when was that? Seventy-five years ago? Where I was raised (the St. Louis area) it was an insult.

I once asked a friend, who had been raised 300 miles from me, what "hoosier" meant to him, and he gave me the same definition I had.

Hoosiers show three characteristics: laziness, envy and and unjustified pride which they use to cover up the fact they're losers.

Not surprisingly, those are three of the Seven Deadly Vices, and they are all interrelated. If you have one of those vices, you have all of them.

I said hoosiers are lazy. That's sloth. They don't want to work. They think other people should support them. They ignore the fact they're high all the time, which they don't see as a problem.

They're also envious, which they don't even know. It manifests itself as trying to drag everyone down to their level. Every hoosier I've known had no brains, no education, no job, no money, a POS $400 car, no house and generally the lowest-rent possible apartment - when they weren't sleeping on relative's couches.

Since they are too dumb and lazy to succeed, they don't want anyone to succeed. That's what envy is.

Anyone thoughtful enough knows that liberalism and feminism are based on envy. But so are the bottom feeders, who always vote Democrat, when they bother to vote.

I have met many people who are working-class, and support themselves and their families. They may not have much of an "education" but they're admirable people and don't have an ounce of hoosier in them.

The unjustified pride manifests itself as continually offering unasked-for advice, and thinking it's good advice and not nonsense. When someone is right near the bottom of the barrel in all ways, their advice on anything is not merely worthless, it's downright dangerous.

It's unfortunate that hoosiers have children. My experience has been about one-third of them turn out to be hoosiers, one-third suffer from "failure to launch," and one-third make something of themselves, although it's always blue-collar.

Male hoosiers are the ones who screw obese women. The Manosphere, as usual, is confused about these things, hence the deluded belief that the "thirsty" and the "Omegas" are the ones doing the landwhales. In reality it's associative mating - hoosiers and landwhales go together because bottom-of-the-barrel ends up with bottom-of-the barrel. That's why you see skinny guys and enormously fat women together at Wal-Mart.

I was recently sitting outside a coffee shop with a friend of mine when a 270-pound hoosier female starting talking to my friend. He knew her from the past. When she left he told me she was on disability - she would have rather weighed 270 pounds than lose weight and work - and that one hoosier male had had sex with her, with the comment to my friend, "Well, it's pussy."

That's pure hoosier.

I've written before that to truly understand people, you have to understand the Seven Deadly Vices and the Seven Cardinal Virtues. Not merely just memorize them, but understand them, which means relating them to people you know and their behavior.

All it takes is time, observation, and a little reflective thought.

Monday, July 27, 2015

Parents Yoked to Their Children for Decades

I can't remember when my father was born - '32? 1933? I can't remember at all when my mother was born. Late '30s, I think.

I do remember he was (as was my mother) a high-school dropout, although later they got their GEDs. At that time the GEDs were worthless (as a high school diploma is worthless today, along with many college degrees).

He spent his life as a general contractor, building four houses a year (it takes three months to build a house). My mother worked as the night admitting clerk in the local ER.

My father once told me, "I could have been rich but it wasn't worth it." I knew what he meant. Enough is as good as a feast, if you can be grateful.

Still, my family had a nice middle-class existence and I never missed the Porsche and the Lear jet because we never had them, so how can you miss what you never had? I had a bike and that was good enough. (At 14 I had a $50 minibike and as far I was concerned it was a jet airplane.)

I also remember my father telling me, "If I tried to do today what I did then, I couldn't do it."

That was not the only time I've been told that recently. That's how bad the economy is - and it's going to stay that way for a long time.

My parents had two children, me and my sister. My father's parents had nine - and my paternal grandfather dropped out of school in the 8th-grade and had a "career" of installing and finishing wooden-strip floors. I barely remember him doing it just one time, when I was about five. He had one of those big orbital sanders.

My father didn't work all that hard, because I worked for him starting at 12. Get up, go to breakfast, go to work, take a 15-minute break, work, take a half-four lunch, work, take a 15-minute break, work, go home, take a bath, then be just fine.

Being a carpenter is mostly a semi-skilled job, although being a contractor is of a much high skill set. But it's not college-degree stuff.

My parents (especially my father) ended up yoked to me and my sister for at least 18 years, until I went away to college and became semi-self-supporting. I paid for my share of an apartment, my used car, the insurance, my food, my phone, gasoline, etc. My parents paid my tuition, which at that time was about $300 a semester and was pretty much still that when I graduated in '83.

Then, in January, 1974, wages stopped going up, which means the best times, economically, in the U.S. were after the end of WWII and that January of '74. There are several reasons wages stopped going up. One, Nixon went off the old standard in '71, allowing the Federal Reserve to have its merry way with inflating the money supply at will Then the federal government got so big it permanently stalled the economy. And then there is the trillions dollars we've sent to our enemies in the Midwest for oil.

Things have gotten better technologically - so we've stomping on the brake and accelerator at the same time. The free market and technology are advancing our standard of living and our bloated government is retarding it.

As an example, first my family went from no AC to a window unit (and I slept on the living-room floor, which I didn't mind at all) to central air. I never had AC in my car until I was 30, because before then I always had subcompacts that only didn't have AC, they didn't have power steering or power brakes). And the TVs we had as kids...I'm only going to say we had rabbit ears on top of the TV and I was not only the rabbit ear adjuster, I was also the remote.

But economically it's a different story, contrary to the lies of the government.

Because of the collapse of wages, due to the importation of Third World morons, inflated money, exportation of jobs, crushing debt and crushing regulations, many people cannot afford children anymore. Unless they want to live in a rural trailer (which I don't think it a bad idea, but that's just me).

The economy has at least doubled since 1980 and if wages had continued to raise at the same level as the 1950s, the mean salary would be about $100,000 a year. I have not only figured this myself but professional economists have figured it, too. And it's always the same figure: about $100,000 a year.

Those are some of the reasons we're not a replacement rate. Children are just too damn expensive, due to our permanently-stalled economy.

There are other problems, too, such as the problems between men and women - created by the government and its "laws" interfering in those relationships. Some women, for an example, think that men are supposed to be attracted to fat women or career women. They're not and never will be.

Women got those ideas from propaganda, propaganda encouraged by the government and oftentimes enforced by law. Such as Affirmative Action, which "White Men Need Not Apply" (I have seen this happen several times with friends).

Men are getting it from all angles. Very few high-paying jobs exist unless you have an in-demand degree, career women who think you're supposed to be attracted to them, fat disgusting women who delude themselves they are attractive...and there are lots more problems.

Women are getting it from all angles, too. If they get a high-paying career job, men aren't good enough for them. If they get some nothing job, they end up getting some sort of transfer payments for their blobby Wal-Mart asses and their low-IQ kids. So men are supporting them whether they want to or not, through taxation.

The whole bizarre thing is right out of Idiocracy - people who have somewhat of a middle-class existence taxed half-to-death to support obese misshapen women, their skinny drug-addict husbands, and their passel of retarded kids.

This is not good and appears to be getting worse. Because we're not at replacement level, the government is importing low-IQ Third Worlders, who aren't going anywhere except to cut my grass. Their kids are going to cut my grass, too, when they're not filling the prisons.

I used to know some retired men who came of age in the '50s. They told me at that time they'd walk into certain businesses and get hired on the spot. These were working-class jobs, but right from the beginning the pay was high enough to easily support themselves. And they got raises fast.

These days, most of the people who work for minimum-wage are about 35 years old.

When I was in high school, and for a few years after I graduated, all the high school graduates went straight to the steel mill. I'd estimate the starting salary at about $25,000 a year - with a high school diploma. And after several years, about $50,000. And right before retiring, about $70,000.

Minimum-wage was for high school kids working at fast-food places.

One or my father's friend did get a college degree in the '50s. He ended up working for Sears back when it was Sears and not K-Mart. Raises every year, new cars, a house in the suburbs with a two-car garage.

Those days are now gone.

The U.S. is already breaking up because of these problems. The inner cities are so far no-go except for the violent and stupid, the rich are living in gated communities high in the hills, and what's left of the middle-class are fleeing to ethnically non-diverse small towns.

The country breaking up means possibly heading toward Third World status. And it's gotten to the point when you have some kids the family's standard of living collapses and you are still yoked to them for a few decades. No wonder so many men are opting out. Why should they have kids when they drain you economically? Not just a little bit, but a lot, to the point it's crushing?

These problems are overwhelmingly caused by government interference in the economy and the culture for the last 40 to 50 years. So if you want to reverse these problems, get rid of the government interference!

That, however, is not going to happen until the collapse is well on its way. It's going to take a miracle to stop what's coming. Personally, I think once we come out the other side things will be just fine.

But until that time, just about all you can do is prepare for it the best you can.

Saturday, July 25, 2015

Sex and Reproduction Stand in Opposition to Each Other

I occasionally engage in thought experiments. "If this was like that, what would be the end result?"

Now imagine if men and women had internal values, under conscious control, that one way would lead to sex and reproduction, and the other way, just sex.

All those arguments about contraception and abortion...gone. Poof. They never would have started in the first place.

For several thousand years people have been trying to control their reproduction, sometimes in gruesome ways, such as exposing babies to die, the way the Romans did.

And a lot of the "witchcraft" in the Bible was about "witches" using herbs to induce abortion.

For the matter, right in Genesis there are admonitions about filling the earth with people, and how women claim they're going to die unless they have children, or daughters having sex with their drunken father in order to have children.

Yet, while the urge for sex is strong, the urge to reproduce is not. That, I suspect is why there are all these prohibitions throughout history against abortion and contraception, and all these encouragements to have children.

Because, when it comes right down to it, many people don't want to have children, and when they do, they want very few, not a lot.

Imagine if we had those internal values 2000 years ago. I wouldn't be surprised if the earth only had about one-fourth the population it has now. If not less.

My paternal grandparents had nine children. Three didn't survive past 21. My father, who almost didn't survive past 17 due to a horrendous car wreck, was one of those nine children. He and my mother only had two: my sister and me.

That's a big drop in the number of children.

If the urge to reproduce was strong, the population of the world wouldn't be dropping (except for Africa).

Since Americans aren't reproducing, everyone is up in arms about it, and it's one reason the government is importing 85 IQ to 90 IQ Third Worlders).

There are even movies about reproduction, such as Idiocracy

The late Arthur C. Clarke, many decades ago (I believe in his novel, Childhood's End) suggested what would happen if we had 100% effective contraception. For one, the destruction of the family.

Science-fiction writers are never right on the specifics (except by accident) but they are often right in general.

When people are not at replacement level, then the formation of families starts to collapse. So Clarke was right in that way.

There was a movie I saw a few years ago, called Children of Men. Its premise is that one day, no more children were being born.

Now imagine where that would lead.

My experience has been that when women put off having children, due to abortion and effective contraception, then when they decide to have children, they can't get pregnant. They get Babies Rabies but no babies pop out. They waited too long. If the urge for reproduction was overwhelming, they'd be squirting out kids at age 13, and refusing all birth control and abortion.

Now where does that lead? Just look around at many of the women today.

My experience has also been many men don't particularly want to have children (again, the urge to reproduce is weak) but when they do, they're glad they did.

Of course, reality puts the kabosh on some of the dumber concepts in the Manosphere, such as women choosing "alphas" to have children then choosing "betas" to provide for them. I've never seen this, not once. There's no evidence for it, either. It's one of the mental masturbatory fantasies, like most evolutionary theory.

You can't have it both ways, with women aborting over 60 million fetuses, along with conception so effective their ovaries have dried up by the time they want to have children. Then allofasudden they run out and if they can pregnant by an "alpha" and then find some "beta" (somewhere, somehow) to support them. What sort of naive nitwit came up with this crap?

In college I was taught men are supposed to want to spread their sperm far and wide while women are supposed to seek one man to support her and her children.

I certainly had problems with that, since my experience starting at age 13 was that women were the wildly promiscuous ones, the ones who'd have sex with any man they found halfway attractive. And that has been the history of the world.

As for men, it wasn't about trying to screw every woman they could, since men are the real romantics. You can't have that both ways, either, with men being the real romantics and at the same time wanting to screw 100 women (I've met guys who've spent their lives seducing women, and all were weaklings incapable of love).

So modern-day evolutionary theory has some fatal problems...just like the Manosphere.

The only way I see out of these problems is to look to the past, when we had government a fraction of the size we have now, with sound money, with high-paying jobs for men where they could support a family (because raising children is extraordinarily expensive and don't those imbeciles in the government realize that?).

Even with effective conception and abortion and the collapse of families, I suspect these problems would cure themselves, as they always have in the past.

This isn't going to happen for a long time, though.

Friday, July 24, 2015

"Hypergamy" and Narcissism

My experience with "hypergamy" is that the more "hypergamous" the woman, the more narcissistic they are.

Take the story of "The Fisherman and His Wife" (posted HERE). The wife wants to be God. Everything she gets is not enough. She wants More&More&More and ends up back in her hovel, poverty-stricken.

The story is essentially a retelling of the story of Adam and Eve. The "serpent" targets Eve with promises of "being like God," and she falls for it. Then a weak Adam listens to her, and they go from Paradise to our fallen world.

I've met a few wealthy men, who wives these men allow to spend and spend and spend, and the wives always wanted more. They were never satisfied and never grateful. The men were weak, like Adam.

"Hypergamous" women are better explained by the Seven Deadly Sins: greedy and lazy and envious. They covet, like Eve.

I've mentioned I read Tom Wolfe's Back to Blood a few years ago, when it first came out.

I recently reread it, and part of the novel is about a "hypergamous" woman and how she wrecks her life.

Her name was Magdalene and she was a Cuban-American, raised in what Wolfe calls a "Low Rent" district of Miama.

She's beautiful but not smart, and under Associative Mating (which is what people really do) her mate should be Hector, a Cuban-American cop who is very much in love with Magdalene and wants to marry her. (As for Hector's brainpower, let's just say he'll never make detective, and sergeant if he's lucky).

But while seeing Hector she is also involved with an rich "Anglo" doctor, so she tells Hector no. Hector of course has a fit, because he never saw it coming.

Then she deludes herself some billionaire Russian crook is interested in her. Not just interested, but fascinated.

He has sex with her one time and dumps her. She has gone from Hector to the doctor to a billionaire.

So she calls Hector, trying to get back together with him. She says something interesting: "Just as I started to feel something for him..."

What matters to her is what she feels. She has problems with boundaries, which is a problem all narcissists have.

Magdalene devalues Hector when he dumps him, she devalues the doctor, she idealizes and then devalues the Russian.

At the end Hector has already found another woman, one actually somewhat smarter then Hector, and who is good for Hector because she makes him a better man.

Magdalene ends up with no job, no boyfriend to support her, no money and no hope. Her life has turned into a living hell. And she never had any gratitude for any of these men. Her attitude was that she deserved it - was entitled to it - and they owned everything they had to her.

Magdalene's story is also a retelling of Eve.

Notice that Hector ends up with a woman who is good for him and makes him a better man.

"Hypergamous" women, being consumed by envy and covetousness and laziness, will bring down every man they get involved with.

It's a more humble, self-aware woman, who wants the man to be happy and be the best he can be - those are the ones who make the best wives.

Not a greedy, lazy, covetous, "hypergamous" woman who's imitating Eve in everything she does.

A Middle-Class Job Ruined by Immigrants and Shot Straight to Hell

I have no respect for those open-border types who think immigrants of whatever nationality will improve the United States. The facts are otherwise. The Third World is a hell hole and many of the immigrants from there want to bring their cultures with them. And when different cultures collide the result is usually, to quote the War Nerd, "genocide." It's also been the history of the world. For a Westerner, just read the Old Testament if nothing else.

I refer to these clueless pseudo-economists as "spergs," as in "Aspergers." They think their theories and misunderstanding of economics is reality, instead of the dumb stories in their head they try to impose on reality. And they cannot change their minds unless reality comes crashing down on their pointy little heads. And even then, sometimes they still don't change their minds.

These people are ideologues - and since ideologues are convinced that what they think is the truth, they will never change their minds. These days - and for a long time before these days - leftists are ideologues. And no matter how many people are killed, they'll never change their minds.

The open-borders fanatics are the same way. No matter how much crime Third World immigrants bring - rape, murder, assault, mugging, burglary, drunken driving - they just look the other way. Just as bad as looking the other way is their rationalizing and making excuses for horrible behavior.

Owning a taxi. as I did for five years, showed me what happens when different cultures collide. Driving a taxi used to be a very good, middle-class job. But not anymore. That was a long time ago. Now taxis are often driven by criminal immigrants.

When I first bought a taxi I encountered some of the older drivers, the ones who started driving in the '50s. They were great guys and we had a good time together. And they were all Americans.

One of them was named Al. He appeared to be in his early 70s but was still driving. The first time I met him he told me when he started driving a taxi he wondered, "Where has this job been all my life?" I knew what he meant. The job was a blast.

Al, like many of us, owned his own taxi. We were independent contractors and made our owns days and hours. We worked when we wanted and started and quit when we wanted.

We paid the taxi company a certain amount a month, and as long as we paid that the company didn't care if we drove or not.

Al told me he worked 11 months out of the year, then took a month off, put his wife in the sidecar of his motorcycle, then for a month they toured the country.

Now how's that for a hell of a job? Better than living in a cubicle like Dilbert and Wally.

I used to work on Friday and Saturday nights because it was a party. Sometimes I'd stop work at 2 or 3 in the morning and go home with $200 cash, excluding my charge accounts.

One of my friends told me about his neighbor across the street when he was growing up. He retired from the Post Office with a lot of money and a good pension and died two months later.

I've met other guys who worked high-paying but unpleasant jobs and died soon after retiring. That's not my idea of a life.

"Oh well, I spent my life slaving away at some awful job, but now I'm retired and will live the good life...I've got how long left, doctor? Two weeks?"

At the end no one has ever said, "I wish I worked more." But some will look back and say, "I wish I had a better time and had more fun."

The fun is mostly gone in driving a cab, ruined by smelly, criminal Nigerians, sex-pervert Muslims who gargle with garlic, corrupt Russians and thieving Somalis. And because of all of these excess drivers the money has collapsed. Driving a taxi is now for poor people.

Not one American driver, black or white, liked Nigerians. And we've had people call the cab company and ask, "Don't send me a foreign driver."

I knew one Nigerian fired because he would not put air-conditioning his his taxi. Some were arrested for stealing credit card numbers. They used binoculars to read people's PINs at ATM machines. One was fired for refusing to let a woman out of his cab and instead driving her around. I've been in fights with them.

In my life I've never met a Nigerian who wasn't a thief and a liar.

Al is no longer with us. He had a stroke and quit driving. I do remember another driver telling me the doctor asked what are these? (touches his own glasses).

Al responds, "I don't know what they're called but I've got some, too." That was Al's humor.

He died maybe six months later, at about 75.

Al had a great life, and like me had an amazing fund of stories.

A few years ago I read a novel by Tom Wolfe, the most well-known chronicler of modern American society. Back to Blood. It wasn't one of his best efforts, but it was good enough.

It was about the multicultural paradise known as Miami, a mishmash of white Americans, Cubans, blacks, Haitians and who-knows-what-else.

Each ethnic group lives in separate neighborhoods and none get along. If they were jumbled together the problems would be even worse.

God knows who drives the taxis down there.

As for me, I got the tail end of when owning a taxi was fun. It was back when drivers were great guys and driving a taxi was a great life. And the drivers were Americans. But that life is gone, ruined by our criminal government and its determined attempt to destroy the United States and its economy through the importation of anti-American, criminal immigrants.

I'll never drive a taxi again or even get in one.

Wednesday, July 22, 2015

The Nonexistence of the "Robber Barons," or, Never Believe a Word a Leftist Says

I learned decades ago to not believe one word any leftist says. They're all liars. Either that or as ignorant as hell.

I suppose at one time I believed "the Robber Barons" existed. Then I found out they didn't. I had been conned by anti-free-market leftists and their writings. They were actually entrepreneurs.

Let's take Andrew Carnegie. Carnegie wasn't American - he was Scottish.

He was an incredibly wealthy man, yet he wrote this: "Man must have an idol - the amassing of wealth is one of the worst species of idolatry - and no idol more abasing than the worship of money."

He spent almost $350,700,000 on various public projects - 2,811 free public libraries, for one example - and when he died, he had disposed of almost everything he possessed. He ended up being buried in Sleepy Hollow, next to Washington Irving.

Then we have J.P. Morgan. He was a sincere Episcopalian, one who had an absolute code of conduct. His riches were based on incremental accumulation (what was been done to "J.P. Morgan" today is another story). Because of his absolute code of right and wrong he ended up being considered an aristocrat, one looked up and respected by the moneyed world.

John Rockefeller once said Morgan wasn't even wealthy.

I could go on, but it's the same thing, over and over.

What these men had in common was that they made their money in the free market.

It's different today. Carlos Slim is right now the richest man in the world and he made his money by having a monopoly given to him by the Mexican government.

I have a friend who taught at a private high school in Mexico and who told me, "There is rich and there is Mexican rich."

He told me one teenage girl came to school in a different outfit every day. She never wore the same outfit twice. Her father was a billionaire.

Bill Gates? Don't make me laugh. One of the reasons Gates is so wealthy is because the U.S. government uses his products. Not only do we buy his products from his company, we have to give him more money through our involuntary taxes. His company, even today, uses versions with bugs in it. They are released early even though defective, to corner the market. That's why there are so patches for Microsoft's products. And I certainly remember the BSOD (Blue Screen of Death) so common on early Microsoft products.

Gates was also born wealthy, which you never hear about.

It's got to the point very few people can become wealthy through the free market. Whenever you hear of someone becoming a billionaire almost invariably they did it though the government favoring them.

About the only two decent people I can think of who made their money through the free market are Stephen King and J.K. Rowling - entertainers.

For that matter, just about the only people I can think of today who become extremely wealthy are "entertainers." The Kardasians? Paris Hilton? Rappers? The popularity of these decadent people is a sign of a degraded culture.

We've gone from admiring and respecting such people as Carnegie and Morgan to worshiping nonentities and non-entertainers.

But when it comes to business - and making tens of billions of dollars - the government has enriched certain people through monopolies and giving them billions in taxpayer money, which impoverishes the taxpayers.

Kevin Phillips, the political scientist, wrote countries go through three phases - agricultural industrial, then in decline and collapse, financial.

This country was originally agricultural, which accounts for Thomas Jefferson's idealization of farmers.

Then we had the industrial - that's when the so-called "Robber Barons" emerged. Wages and the standard of living were skyrocketing.

Now we are in the final phrase - the financial. Along with the financial goes Empire.

That's when you get massive government, horrendous debt, a sputtering economy, declining wages, bread and circuses for entertainment, billionaires created by the government.

Governments based on these things always collapse. Look at Greece.

The reason we have avoided the fate of Greece is, for one thing, we are the world's reserve currency. We have access to the world's entire economy through our money, which is why you can use American dollars in Canada and Mexico but you can't use their money here.

Too bad there are no Andrew Carnegies and J.P. Morgans around any more. They were infinitely better than having pictures of Kim Kardashian's greasy ass shoved in my face.

Tuesday, July 21, 2015

The Peace and Joy of Happily-Married Life

"What a happy and holy fashion it is that those who love one another should rest on the same pillow" - Nathaniel Hawthorne

When I was in college I delivered pizzas. Once, when my car broke down after I had delivered my last one, I knocked on the door of a "starter" house (do they exist anymore?) and the man let me use his phone (there was no cellphones at that time).

His wife and two kids were there.

I experienced something usual, and I still wonder about it and other experiences like it.

The man and his life appeared to be very happy. What I was picking up from them was happiness, warmth, friendliness.

I've never been able to figure out if I imagined these things or if I was somehow really picking up those feelings radiating from this family. But I lean towards picking up those feelings.

It reminded me of a saying I once read: "the peace and joy of happily-married life." William James said something similar about the peace and happiness of a good marriage, and how surprised he was at what he experienced.

That's what I was picking up from these people. Peace and happiness.

Later, I gained admittance to what was clearly a very expensive house, almost a mansion. The feeling was one of coldness and distance. No one was paying the slightest bit of attention to anyone.

I've experienced both several times, but not in such extreme form. Which leads me to think most marriages or neither very happy or very unhappy. Extremely happy ones are rare, but then, so are extremely unhappy - they get divorced.

When parents do not have a happy marriage, what then do children have to emulate? I'm sure that has a lot of do with the poor state of relationships between men and women.

I have a friend whose parents fought all the time. He and I both agree that these arguments happen because the husband and wife enjoy them. Yet they rarely understand the effect it has on the kids.

My friend in fact once pulled a .22 rifle on his father, watched his mother split his father's scalp open with a phone, watched his father accidentally knock his mother out.

Then there were the unending police cars outside the house.

My friend is not married. He's said he never wanted to be married. He was a 21-year-old son, but he's not married.

Unfortunately men are the true romantics - and I've lost count of the divorced men I know who now hate women - because they didn't want to get divorced and the ex-wife raped them in our joke of a court system.

Then there are the never-married or divorced women who are full of hate and rage. I've seen several of these women and they lash out at any man in their vicinity.

I have a hard time imagining any of these people having happily-married parents to emulate.

A few months ago, I suppose, I saw an older man on TV - perhaps 65 - who spoke rapturously of his long-term marriage. One argument in 40 years.

Sitting a few seats from him was an unmarried man apparently his late 20s - and his attitude was the exact opposite of the older man.

Neither man spoke about their parent's marriages. I wish they had.

Obviously, the older man came from a different time. The younger man came from the modern times.

It's not just the emulation of a good marriage, there's a lack of education. The Old Testament, for all the horrors in it, also contains some very good wisdom about men and women. Is that still taught in church? Apparently not.

Good advice also exists in literature. I was surprised when I read Nathaniel Hawthorne, he of The Scarlet Letter we read in high school. Yet he, too, wrote about the greatness of a happy marriage. He had the experience - he was writing about his own ("We were never so happy as now—never such wide capacity for happiness, yet overflowing with all that the day and every moment brings to us. Methinks this birth-day of our married life is like a cape, which we have now doubled and find a more infinite ocean of love stretching out before us").

What literature exits today about such things? If it does exist, I'm not familiar with it.

We lack almost everything about what makes a happy marriage: examples, church, literature.

It's gotten so bad one of my friends mentioned to me he knows a 45-year-old women, going back to college, who took a class on "Society and Marriage," or a class with a similar name. He told me he was surprised at the wisdom in the textbook.

Is this how these things are taught today? In college? It's better than nothing, but way too late.

You're such not going to get much good advice from the Manosphere, not with the babbling from the more popular writers, many of whom are liars and frauds, about "alphas" and the "Dark Triad" and other such inaccurate concepts.

I wonder what the future. But then, I often wonder about the future.

The marriage rate is about 50%, which means it's really going to affect children, since the family is the bedrock of society.

It's been a long time since I've been in a house where I felt that peace and happiness from the family within. Years, actually.

That's not good at all, for men, for women, for children, for society.

I, For One, Welcome Our New Eve Overlords

I think women should rule the world. Now, of course, this can only be done through the force of law, since it goes against human nature, but that’s okay. Human nature, if you’re a leftist, doesn’t matter. Because to them it doesn’t exist!

Let’s look at what we’d have to do. First, we’d have to keep men out of influential high-paying jobs that require a lot of education and work. That can be done with Affirmative Action, which essentially means “white men need not apply.”

We’d also have to keep men out of college, which is what is happening these days. Right now there are a lot more women in college than men. This is a good thing. No, it’s a great thing!

Men should only be carpenters (I used to be one), taxi drivers (used to be one), coal miners (nope), stuff like that. Stuff that women don’t want to do because it’s too hard, hot, dirty, dangerous, unpleasant, etc.

Women want those nice indoor air-conditioned jobs where they can sit around, drink coffee, hold meetings, and think they’re working. And this is good!

One of my taxi driver friends got murdered. Another got repeatedly stabbed in the face with a steak knife by a crazy woman. Then there was the one had the misfortune of having a pistol pointed at him three times during three different robberies. But all of this is okay! Men are worthless and expendable!

The fact is, men shouldn’t be educated at all. They’re awful!! They should be like those Epsilon-Minus Semi-Morons in Brave New World, the ones that ran the elevators. Serves them right.

The worst -- especially the worst! – are white men, who are drooling troglodyte sexist racist homophobic specieist child-molesting rapist pornographer Ice People brutes who introduced slavery into the world. (Well, actually, that’s not true – white men got rid of slavery, and in record time: about 55 years, after slavery was around at least 7000 years. But facts don’t matter!)

Men should receive no education at all. Not even reading, writing and arithmetic! Revenge is good, and it doesn’t matter if it’s aimed at the wrong people.

One way to prevent this education is by drugging little boys. I think Ritalin would be a good choice. It’ll fix their brains up but good, like that Ritalin child Kurt Cobain, who returned the favor by fixing his own brains permanently!

Yep, make sure men receive no education, dope them up, prevent them by law from getting educated jobs…and women will be able to rule the world!

Now what kind of world would we have if women ruled it completely and men had absolutely no influence at all, had no education, and were completely at the bottom?

I think the humorist P.J. O’Rourke gave us a clue with his comment, “Without men, civilization would last until the next oil change.” Or as Camille Paglia commented, if women had been in charge of civilization, we’d still be living in grass huts. Okay, well, maybe teepees.

Hmmm…let’s see…who invented about 97% of everything in the world? Well, as best as I can remember, it was European men and their descendants in America. Those horrible hideous white men who are responsible for every problem in the world! . . . they invented almost everything? Huh?

But let’s concentrate on the United States and not the entire world. If women ruled completely and men had no influence at all, it’d be a great country. Utopia! Paradise on Earth!

Things would go backward, of course, I suppose to some sort of primitive, barely technological society. Tribal and pastoral. But that would be great!

I think I might be exaggerating a little bit (or maybe a lot) but you can learn a lot from reductio ad absurdum.

Very few women can invent anything – or drive for that matter -- but so what? A primitive, loving, pastoral tribe in which everyone chipped in and helped change the babies…it’d be wonderful! It’d be just like that idyllic tribe in One Million Years B.C., in which Raquel Welch wore a two-piece fur bikini. Woo hoo, what a life! I can’t wait.

Of course, women (and some men) don’t believe this would happen. Somehow – not quite sure how – we’d still have an advanced technological society with big-screen TVs and SUVs and dentistry and surgery and easy high-paying careers, even though men would be so uneducated, stupid, doped up and out of work they couldn’t do anything except drink and smoke dope and lie around jerking off to computer porn and wondering how to use that sex-toy they bought mail-order.

But what the heck. All those women oppressed throughout history, why, once they’re free, think of all the inventions waiting to be invented by them! Forget that Gloria Steinem said that logic didn’t matter. It doesn’t matter! Or that there are certain things that shouldn’t be investigated, like the differences between men and women. She’s right about that, too!

And of course, women would have all the government jobs, so we can be ruled by bureaucrats. Of course, being women, they won’t act like bureaucrats, unless they were mommy-bureaucrats. Thank God for that!

Women being supported by the government is a good thing, since marriage would collapse, what with men not being able to support a family. So women would have babies without being married or the children having a father’s influence. All of us would end up acting lower-class. And this is good!

It’s always a good thing for teenage girls to not get married and have kids to get more welfare. And for teenage boys to form gangs as surrogate families. And the fact these things are caused by not having intact families with fathers? It’s a good thing!

In essence, women would be marrying the government. And this is a good thing. Families and fathers are so primitive!

Well, primitive yes, but not primitive like tribal primitive. That’s good primitive. It’d be some other kind of primitive, like not-needed primitive, like hair in your ears or nostrils.

So what if many women would be unhappy hateful frustrated hysterical shrews, except for all those revenge-minded man-hating lesbians who helped found feminism? And envious ugly leftist feminists like the hideous monster Betty Friedan? And if men are unhappy and drink and do drugs and get violent? Ha! Since when did happiness ever matter? Revenge is what matters! Fairness is what matters…well, yeah, I know, it wouldn’t be fair, but so what?

And if society didn’t advance and instead went backwards, so what about that, too? Primitive tribes without dental care and air-conditioning are the place to be!

Many women are natural socialists, which means they are irrational, ruled by their feelings and think everyone should be forced to share and do favors for others whether they want to or not. This is good. I think that’s the reason they’ve always been denied the vote. That’s not good! It’s certainly why so many of them vote Democrat. And that’s good!

Throughout history women have always been the home and the heart (maybe it should be the Home and the Heart). Men have always been the rational creative inventing part – the fixers, the inventors, the discoverers.

About 40 years ago the brain researcher Paul McLean discovered three structures to the brain: at the bottom, the reptilian complex, on top of that, the limbic system (emotion) and on top of that, the neocortex (reason).

One writer called it the Snake brain, the Eve brain, and the Adam brain. But whatever you call it, the rational brain sits on top of the emotional brain, which means our emotions are supposed to be subject to our reason -- not the other way around.

It’s not as if men are all reason and women are all emotion. Each sex has a bit of the other in it, like Jung postulated with the anima/amimus or that Yin/Yang thingie.

If each gender didn’t have a bit of the other in it, we’d never be able to understand each other. Both sexes have mirror neurons, although women have more. Men have a bigger visual-spatial area in their brain. That’s a bad thing! . . .I think.

But, heck, so what? Facts don’t matter. Only archaic left-wing socialist/tribal fantasies matter. It doesn’t even matter if they don’t work and destroy lives and societies!

I, for one, welcome our new Eve overlords. All our base are belong to them!

Monday, July 20, 2015

I Almost Get Arrested Over a Whore

Uh oh I thought, as a car hurtled toward my taxi, stopped, then four guys flew out and rushed toward me. What's going on this time?

My first thought was they had the wrong guy and they were going to beat me and kick me and smash me in the teeth.

I have a vivid imagination.

All of them flashed badges at me.

"Get out of the car!"

What the hell? I got out of the car. I actually felt relieved I was avoiding the beating and kicking and teeth smashing.

Vice cops, it turned out. Oh damn. I'm going to jail on a Friday night. And no night court. I'd be out Monday morning.

It was Friday evening and I was heading home when a young woman, about 19, walked up to me and needed a ride out to a West County apartment complex. She said she'd pay me 70 dollars to take her out there, wait half an hour, then take her back to where I picked her up. Easy money.

I knew she was a hooker by the way she was dressed, but what the hell? Lots of hookers used cabs. None of them had cars because the money just flowed through their hands like water.

So I gave her a ride, and damn if I didn't fall into a sting operation.

Once the cops realized I wasn't going to give them any trouble, they sent her out and we were allowed to leave. They didn't even care about the empty quart beer bottle she left on the floor in the back seat.

I didn't understand what was going on, not at all. A sting operation and we were allowed to leave? What kind of sting operation is that?

Of course, since she didn't get paid, I didn't get paid. She whined to me, "I was playing with his dick when he got up and showed me his badge."

A few days later, reading the paper, I found out what happened.

The sting operation was targeted against the city prosecuting attorney, a lowlife named George Peach.

Right from the beginning Peach had a hardon for putting hookers in jail and pictures of their customers in the newspaper.

Prostitution is a misdemeanor, which means up to a year in jail. What I was doing, the cops told me, was a felony - "promoting prostitution." But they told me to keep doing it if I wanted - they weren't interested me in the slightest. They just wanted to know who I was.

Peach was a whackjob. While vigorously prosecuting hookers and johns, he was seeing prostitutes and paying for them with city money!

So the sting operation was targeted against him and I just accidentally fell into it. That's why they were not interested in me or the girl.

The cops bugged a hotel room and got Peach on tape asking for blowjob. I was almost on the floor over that one. Pay? When I owned a taxi girls used to offer them to me all the time to try to get out of paying money for rides. One girl asked if I would buy her a cheeseburger and another when I gave her money to buy a pack of cigarettes.

She had originally asked for a nickel and when I gave her the four dollars of change in my pocket she said, "Thank you! Thank you! Can I suck your dick?"

Such is the life of a cab driver.

Peach of of course lost his job and license but didn't go jail. He should have gone to prison and experienced the beating and kicking and teeth smashing from the other prisoners. Or best of all, a bunch of hookers. Poetic justice.

Years before I had met an old retired city judge who was so old he was in a wheelchair. I figured he was judge in the late 1930s/early '40s.

He told me once a month all the city cops swept up all the hookers and took them in so they were tested and treated for whatever diseases they had.

I agreed with it. Prostitution will never be eradicated - there is a reason it's called "the world's oldest profession."

This way the cops knew all the girls and could actually protect them. And if they got paid for this under the table, that is the kind of corruption with which I agreed.

Before all this happened I had been working for a escort service, since another girl had approached me at a hotel and wanted me to take her to where the service was located - a tiny house in an alley. I ended up being offered a night job. So I took it, and of all things, ended up being a bodyguard for the girls. So I understood how the cops in the past did these things.

I had no idea what was wrong with Peach, but he had some major psych problems to do what he did.

Self-delusion, narcissism, thinking he was above the law while destroying people's lives - he really was a piece of shit. He was one of the worst possible people to be in authority. He ended up destroying himself - "Pride goes before destruction" and all the rest of it.

Last I heard he was selling insurance. Not that I would buy anything from the creep.

By the way, I remember the girl's name - first and last. She left her purse in the car and while she was inside I looked through it and found her driver's license. She was Canadian.

I wonder what happened to her? I hope she ended up having a better life than Peach. Even as a whore she was better than him.

Sunday, July 19, 2015

The Cabbie Who Vaporized His Hand

Ray drove a taxi at the airport and the "county official" in charge of the airport taxis kept telling the starter to fire Ray. He never did.

Good thing because it would have been a major lawsuit.

Incidentially the starter is the guy in a little booth who calls up the taxis from in line to pick up passengers.

In the movie Planes, Trains and Automobiles the angry man who grabs Steve Martin by his balls and drags him along the concrete is the starter.

The reason I know this is because the scene is set at Lambert Field in St. Louis, which is where Ray worked.

Later Ray moved to a local cab company, the one at which I owned a cab.

Ray did not have a left hand. That's why the old bastard, who was as corrupt as hell and is now dead, thank God, wanted Ray fired.

I was one of the few people who knew why Ray was missing his left hand.

When he was 21 years old he took an empty toilet tissue roll, put in it what he described as the gunpowder from "a thousand firecrackers," wrapped it in duct tape, then lit the fuse.

Before he could even throw it the fuse went ZIP and the bomb went BOOM! The FBI later said the explosion was equal to one-quarter of a stick of dynamite.

Ray, who was left-handed, had his left hand vaporized.

He told me he didn't remember much after that until he woke up in the hospital. "It was a pretty big bandage," he told me, "but not big enough to have a hand under it."

He lifted his sheet and noticed a big bandage by his groin.

"OH MY GOD I BLEW IT OFF TOO!"

He felt around and found "it" was still attached and undamaged.

While in the hospital two FBI agents showed up quizzing him about this huge explosion which set off alarms at a local plant. When they saw what happened to Ray they pretty much left with no more questions. I'm sure they were thinking, "Dumbass."

Ray ended up having to write with his right hand.

At the airport he was called "Hook" because he had one of those two-pronged pincer-hands that he often wore. Sometimes he wore nothing but a sock over his stump because when bare it hurt from changes in the weather.

He told me he was arrested one time and the only thing the cop could do is hang one of the cuffs on his hook and warn him, "Don't take it off."

I was in his car one time when he ran a stop sign and the cop didn't give him a ticket (how can you give a ticket to a man without a hand?) but just scolded him. Ray actually hung his head and I just snickered.

Ray was a major drug addict since age 15 and used to live in my back room when things went really bad in his life for reasons I will not go into here. Let's just say he did things he did not remember, such as holding a 9mm pistol against his "girlfriend's" head. He said he had no memory whatsoever of doing it. She sure did.

But he died in June of 2000 at age 49 from a self-inflicted drug overdose. He did this while living with me in my back room. He got a bunch of Seconals from a pill doctor, went into some woods about 15 miles away, and swallowed the whole bottle, washing them down with some Coke.

His skeleton was found six months later. A cop showed up at my apartment with the attitude Ray and I were homosexual lovers and I had killed him. He wanted in but no dice on that. Later a much more pleasant detective showed up and I didn't let him in, either. He told me Ray was found wearing women's black silk underwear.

I was wondering why I found women's black silk underwear in Ray's room, under his bed. The hypodermic needles I understood.

Ray was a drug addict, promiscuous (and like all promiscuous guys his women were bottom-ot-the barrel) and a sexual pervert (the underwear was the least of his problems). Yet, for all that, he was a pretty good guy.

He left his hook in my living room closet, where it hung for a few years until I gave it away to a thift store.

Saturday, July 18, 2015

Sex and Taxis

When I first bought my cab I had no idea how much sex with involved with driving a taxi. All kinds, some normal, most not even close to normal.

The first one the comes to mind is that while heading home one Friday night I heard someone yell, "Yoo hoo, yoo hoo, Mister taxi driver!"

When I looked I found a six-foot-tall black man, dressed as a woman, waving at me from the sidewalk. I motioned him over and he wobbled over in his high heels, got in my car, and waved himself with his hand, as if cooling off his overheated imagination.

"Thank God you picked me up!" he exclaimed. "God knows what some of these men out there would do to a woman by herself!"

I didn't say a thing, but did notice his expertly-applied make up.

That wasn't the only transvestite I picked up. Two were regular riders, whom the dispatchers referred to "Neal and Bob," because that was what they did for a living.

Then of course there was the time I was filling my cab at the gas station when some scrawny crack whore asked me for a nickel for a pack of cigarettes.

I was so amused I gave her all the change in my pocket, about four bucks. She was so grateful her face lit up and she exclaimed,

"Thank you! Thank you! Can I suck your dick?"

I did one of those snort/chortle things. When she wouldn't stop ("I really really really want to suck your dick!") I had a hard time suppressing myself. I've been in situations before where I could not stop laughing and this had the potential to be one of them. I finally got her to go inside and buy her cigarettes, and I drove away. I chortled for quite a while.

I once had another crack whore knock on my window and when I rolled it down she asked, "Can I suck on you a while for a sandwich?"

A blowjob for a cheeseburger?

I gave her about five dollars and told her to get something to eat. Then she went to the cab in front of me and knocked on his window. She must have been looking for fries and a drink.

Driving at night was...interesting. I was once parked on the street waiting for a call and had a woman come out of a bar across the street - with her shoes in her hand - and ask me if I was "looking for some company." When I said no she turned around and got into a truck that had pulled up to the stop sign.

"Damn," I thought. "That was fast."

One time - again at night - I picked up a young woman who said, "Look back here" and when I did she pulled up her shirt and was showing me her breasts. They weren't even close to being good ones.

"Ever had a black girl suck your cock?" she asked.

I had a hell out a time getting her out of the cab. Street walkers apparently go to the "How to be An Aggressive Whore and Never Take No for an Answer" School of Prostitution.

Another time one girl started gasping and moaning in the back seat and I thought, "Oh fuck, she's playing with herself." I just ignored it and when she got out she just walked away without paying. I just let it go.

I asked some other drivers about it and most said, yes, women had masturbated in the back seat for most of them. Apparently it's some sort of fantasy for a lot of women.

Only one woman got really aggressive with me. She tried to stick her tongue in my ear and when her friend said something she said, "Shut up, I'm trying to fuck this white man," then started in on me again, asking if I had a big dick and if she could see it. I just rolled my eyes.

How the hell do you answer something like that?

At least they paid me and were easy to get out of the car.

Quite a few people used to ask me for directions. At least one time that didn't happen, when a woman pulled up next to me and honked her horn. When I rolled my window down she asked,

"Are you looking for a date?"

When I said no she drove away, dateless until her next honk. Or the one after that.

"Looking for a date," I learned fast, meant, "You want a blowjob?"

Sometimes I couldn't even pull over on a side street to wait for a call without some woman coming down off her porch and asking me "if I wanted a date."

One particular women lived behind me and one night I was awakened by a male voice crashing his car into my dumpster and screaming, "You're nothing but a fucking whore!" The dumpster was undamaged but I wonder what his car looked like, since he hit the dumpster two or three times.

I guess these women figured I had money in my pocket so I might be an easy mark. In my case, every time, they guessed wrong.

The absolute worst was when I picked up two fat, dirty, smelly, ugly bull-dyke lesbians. They were disgusting I wished I had a bowl to puke in because I felt sick.

Speaking of lesbians, one early Sunday morning I got a call to a lesbian bar - called the Kit Kat Club - and when I went inside out of the sunlight I couldn't see.

When my sight came back I found half-a-dozen ugly dykes with pool sticks giving me hostile looks. I imagined being beaten and tossed out the window onto the sidewalk, like you see in bad westerns.

"Is Blah Blah here?" I asked. "Her taxi is here." She saved me by standing up from the bar. At least she wasn't a catastrophe, but what the hell was she doing at a dyke bar at 9 am on a Sunday morning?

Gay bars weren't all that fun, either. Most of passengers staggered out drunk and once when I had to go inside to get him the whole place was painted purple. I was expecting pink. And my passenger was so drunk the bartender threw him out.

One guy came out and looked like a skull with skin. Late-stage HIV, obviously, and I'm sure he didn't last long after taking him home

I didn't experience this but in one area where I got a lot of rides one fag was found dead in his car with his pants around his ankles. A friend of mine, who used to drive a taxi for me and lived by a cop, told me the cop told him two fags came out of a bar, got into one's car, the owner died of a drug overdose (I believe the autopsy mentioned amyl nitrate) and apparently the other one fucked him in the butt anyway, then got out and ran.

I ended up knowing the location of gay bars, dyke bars, the strolls for streetwalkers, one whorehouse and one escort service.

I wondered if a decent woman would ever hit on me, Nope, not once. It was all just transvestites, dykes, fags, whores and drunk women playing with themselves in my back seat.

And, apparently, necrophilia.

"Pleasure and Procreation"

Edith Wharton, one of the best writers of the 20th century and a very smart woman, once said women getting the vote was low on the priorities of most women of her time because, to quote her, women were made "for pleasure and procreation." And by use of those things they could get what they wanted from men.

What she meant, unstated, was love. She clearly didn't just mean sex, because love (with sex) is one of the greatest pleasures that exists for men. And it can be one of the most intense, lifelong pleasures for men.

She's right, of course. And most men will work harder when they have love and family. Without those things we get PUAs and MGTOWs, with today are so common there are names for them.

Without something greater than themselves to sacrifice for, men will live just for themselves, and work just enough to support themselves. Freud, for all his weirdness, did write that "work and love" were the keys to happiness.

What's more important? The infinitesimal changes created by voting? Or raising the next generation?

Some years ago I was standing in line next to three women who were talking to each other. One said she loved being a stay-at-home mom. I wonder how much money her husband made for her to do this?

These days, overwhelmingly, the standard of living has to be decreased for a mother to stay at home with the children. In the past one man, on his salary alone, could support a family and have a nice house. Those days are gone for a long, long time.

I know a couple who have moved into a rural area, where the kids are homeschooled by the mother, which consists of walking around in the woods while she explains things to them.

They live in a rural trailer and the husband barely makes a living.

Personally this sounds like heaven to me, since I spent my early teen years wandering around just looking at things. The only thing I watched on TV were Saturday morning cartoons, which apparently don't exist anymore. Otherwise I had no use for it.

How many of you have even seen a mud puppy? A snapping turtle? A snake swimming in a lake? Wild bamboo and wild onions? Caught a crawdad? Found lit flares by the railroad tracks and realized they burned underwater? I did these things by 12.

I just wished I had a mentor to wander around with me and explain things.

Public school was worthless and for all practical purposes I could have dropped out after the first grade.

The only time I enjoyed school was when I was in the gifted program one summer inbetween the sixth and seventh grade. I went to school maybe one-and-one-half hours a day.

Some women, unfortunately, are deluding themselves they "can have it all."

They can't, contrary their hallucinations. What I have seen are women working horrible minimum-wage jobs. Never married and divorced, nearly every one of them. A lot of them are not fulfilling their purposes. Most men aren't good enough to them to love and they're busy aborting tens of millions of babies. "Pleasure and procreation?" Not anymore.

Most especially when women are not reproducing the next generation, which is why we are not at replacement level. And as for pleasure - not when some women are busy with "career," are fat, can't dress, and if they can "dress," overdress and put on their make-up with a paint roller. No wonder half the men are not married, with exceptionally unpleasant choices such as those.

What's better? Not having the vote and having home, husband and children, or having the vote and not having home, husband and children?

Women shouldn't be allowed to vote. I point out often that women voted Hitler into office. Without them, he never would have made it. Men overwhelmingly voted against him.

They also voted Barry Soetero into office, who is busy trying to destroy the United States.

I once knew a woman who thought Barry was a great President. I told her the truth - that he was a half-breed crackhead homosexual Commie who clearly knew so he little he could destroy the country. She was so outraged she never spoke to me again.

Many women - probably about 80% - are natural socialists/fascists. They don't understand economics or political science but are absolutely convinced they do. That's downright scary.

That's the reason women have throughout history been denied the vote, because once they the vote they destroy everything.

Now we have 50% or so of people not married and not having kids. That means a long slow slide to the End of Society as We Know It.

Most women, as always, will blame everything on men. Even when they screw up everything, they'll still blame it on men.

Enough of them have gotten easy, high-paying jobs (created by men) and when they look around for a "suitable" man they find he's not there. And of course, that's the man's fault for not having a college degree and some high-paying indoor job.

There are not enough men with college degrees to be matched with women with college degrees. Those are just the facts and right now nothing can do done about that.

I know a woman who has a high-paying sinecure she does at home on the Internet. She also told me "men were responsible for all the problems in the world." That's not the only time a woman had told me that. Both made a lot of money from jobs that were created by men. They're eaten up by envy and resentment.

And if a man does have a high-paying indoor job, why in the world would he be attracted to a woman like that? Or do women think men judge women on those characteristics?

They don't.

Men without love and wife and children will decrease work and their standard of living because they have only themselves to support. They're spend their time with hobbies and their friends.

Women want to increase their standard of living and get outraged when men are no longer going along with their desires.

Exactly how many women can figure out the problem? Not many, apparently.

I first noticed not in high school but in college mediocre women who put an exceptionally high value on themselves and expected men to be attracted to them. And were outraged when things didn't go according to their plans. They never had a clue what the problem was.

It's not hard to tell the future. Men, who created about 99% of everything in the world, will be working less and creating less. Marriage is on the rocks and is worth less and less for many men. Children not being born. And many women ignoring their part in the creating the problem and blaming everything on men.

It won't last, of course.

Friday, July 17, 2015

Gun Control Equals Murder

Exactly once in my life have I felt like I was two inches tall. I was driving a taxi and was in an office to pick up a package. While the secretary was out of the room I looked around and saw, on her shelf, two pictures with a teen-age girl in each one. I knew them, but couldn't remember anything about them. Even stranger, they appeared to be twins, or close to it. How could I completely forget these two girls?

When the secretary returned, I commented, "I know those girls from someplace, but I can't remember where."

To this she replied, "You've seen those pictures in the newspaper. Those are my daughters, the ones who were killed on the old Chain of Rocks bridge."

"Oh," I said. Then, "I'm sorry; I didn't make the connection."

"That's okay," she said. "Don't worry about it."

I was horrified. I felt like I could have crawled in a mouse hole. When I told a friend about this, he put his hand over his eyes and said, "Oh, God."

The old Chain of Rocks bridge, which in far north St. Louis, was closed down sometime in the '60s. We used to party on it in high school, hundreds, sometimes a thousand of us. These days it is a bike and walk-way from Illinois to Missouri. In between the end of the parties and the start of the bikes, it was known for one thing: two 19-year-old girls (who weren't twins, but just looked a lot like each other) who were murdered on it.

They were, like their mother, less than five-feet-tall, and less than one-hundred pounds. Tiny little girls. I've worked out with weights that weigh more then they did.

They had taken their visiting cousin, a teenage boy, to show him their poetry they had written on the bridge. I don't remember exactly what it was about, but I believe it was the sort of idealistic "We can all get along" poetry than teen-age girls sometimes write.

While they were on it, four teen-age boys found the girls on the bridge, raped them, then threw them over the side. The drop to the Mississippi is about 70 feet. I have been on that bridge many times, and I wouldn't want to jump off of it. I'd live, because I could make it to the shore. . .but two tiny girls wouldn't be able to.

Only one body was ever found. Their cousin was made to jump over the side, but he was able to swim to the shore.

The police found all four boys rapidly. Like all criminals, they were stupid. One left his flashlight with his name on it on the bridge. All of those over the age of sixteen were convicted and given the death penalty; the 15-year-old got 30 years.

One of the rapist/murderers was executed, and swore right up to the point the needle was stuck in his arm he was innocent. Which he wasn't.

The leader got life in prison, because his IQ was so low and he was abused as a kid. However, he was smart enough to try to cover his crime. He wasn't retarded, just stupid.

The 15-year-old boy got 30 years but was let out after 15. He was going to be paroled earlier but said he didn't want out. Guilt, I suppose. When he did finally get out he wrote the family a letter of apology.

The other three never admitted their guilt or showed any remorse or contrition.

When people tell me they are for gun control this is the case I always bring up.

If those girls had had even a two-shot .22 derringer on them, they would be alive today. Criminals are not only stupid, they also cowards. Even if they had shot the leader – who almost always has the biggest mouth – the rest would have run.

Even if they would have had a knife with a big enough blade – maybe three, three-and-one-half inches – they'd probably still be alive.

When a version of this article was published, I made a bet with myself that at least one idiot would email me and say it would be a bad thing for those girls to have a pistol. I got only one, fortunately, but I did win that bet.

I was reminded of that old saying that a liberal is someone who would rather see a woman raped and strangled with her own pantyhose that see her defend herself with a pistol. I believe L. Neil Smith originated it, and he also called me "a gentleman and a barbarian," which made me smile.

I sometimes have this fantasy I run across this scene, and just happen to have my .357 Sig Sauer on me. The one I load with Magsafes, frangible ammo that are like little shotgun shells. I think I would make all four of those boys jump off the bridge. And if they didn't, I'd shoot them in their both their feet and then their knees. I'd have to reload, but that's okay. And then I'd disappear, and nobody ever finds out who I am.

I have yet to find anyone who can come up with a reason for gun control.

I'll be waiting for the rest of my life.

Wednesday, July 15, 2015

Warrior, Worker, Entertainer, Whore – and Corporations as God

I read a lot of science fiction in-between 12 and 14. When your mind is stretched like that, it never goes back to its original shape.

I don’t read that much sf anymore, but I still do read it. I watch an occasional movie, too.

Blade Runner was always one of my favorite movies. Like all science fiction – literature, movies, TV – it never gets the specifics right, but in general, it’s very often right on the money.

One of the things that stuck me about Blade Runner is that there isn’t any portrayal of what kind of government. There are cops, but they don’t run society. Who they work for is never mentioned.

What appear to run society are corporations, specifically the Tyrell Corporation. It’s housed in a pyramid-shaped building, a hundred or so stories tall. The portrayal of society in the movie is that it is one both ancient and modern, both advanced and degraded – and the Egyptian pyramids were a symbol of the degradation of an advanced society.

The movie is telling us that future corporations will be more powerful than governments, and when they get too big and powerful, it’s a sign of the degradation of society. And that is the case today.

I call modern corporations “Cosmodemonic Transnational Megacorporations.” In the world of Blade Runner, they are Cosmodemonic Interstellar Megacorporations.

Mussolini defined fascism as “corporatism,” so I’d guess the world of Blade Runner is a fascist one. Since corporations are creations of the State, they are inherently as anti-free-market as can be. Thomas Jefferson, for one, despised them as "the moneyed interests" and wanted to make them illegal.

Corporations don’t care about human life, only profit. That’s the way they always have been. For example, contrary to the myth, the American War for Independence was not about taxation.

It was about the largest corporation in the world – the East India Company (aka John Company) being given a tax rebate of millions of pounds to run its small American competitors out of business.

The war was caused by a corporation, one that put money ahead of life. But then, don’t they always?

In the world of Blade Runner the Tyrell Corporation has learned to grow genetically-engineered people. I assume it’s in artificial wombs, which has been a staple of science fiction.

If test-tube babies aren’t bad enough, those in Blade Runner are genetically-engineered to fulfill certain roles.

Roy Batty, who appears to have wolf DNA inserted into him, is engineered to be a Warrior. Leon, who looks like a turtle (and who is asked questions about turtles) is mentally slow and engineered to be Worker in dangerous environments.

Kris, playful as a raccoon (in one scene she sprays a black mask across her face) is engineered to be a “comfort girl” – a Whore. Zora, who is an entertainer, performs with a snake (and tries to strangle her pursuer).

When corporations get the power to engineer people, including inserting animal DNA into them, they will do it. And at that time, corporations will be playing God. Not, I’ll add, that they aren’t trying to do it already.

There has been at least one movie that I am familiar with that is somewhat of a spin-off of Blade Runner - Soldier, with Kurt Russell.

It’s set a few hundred years in Blade Runner’s future, and Russell is also a genetically-engineered soldier. At the end he shows himself to be human, just as at the end of Blade Runner Roy Batty shows himself to be human, just as all the replicants showed themselves to be human and not just non-human “skinjobs,” as one police officer referred to them.

The purpose of Corporations (which are creations of the State) is to turn you into a Working/Consuming Machine. The purpose of the State is to turn you into a Killing Machine.

Workers and Warriors – that’s all the fascist marriage of State and Corporations wants from people. To turn them into machines – organic machines. And all they supposed is need to cheap sex and cheap entertainment. Whores and bread and circuses.

Organic machines sometimes engineered through genetics, sometimes through drugs, and always though propaganda.

In fact, if the State and Corporations had their way, we’d be engineered to look like the Moties in The Mote in God’s Eye - Warriors all blades and Workers with two arms on one side and one on the other.

Our future is going to be as strange as the strangest of science fiction.

Tuesday, July 14, 2015

The Boy Who Couldn't Walk

“I have striven not to laugh at human actions, not to weep at them, nor to hate them, but to understand them.” — Spinoza

Kelby was 11 years old and couldn't walk.

I used to pick him up at his house and take him to and from school.

The other drivers who took him to and from school in years past told me he had been born like this and had a twin brother (twin or fraternal no one knew) who was still-born. I guess he was pretty lucky to survive himself.

Kelby wore braces for his legs, which kept them permanently stiff. He couldn't bend them and used a walker.

I'd put him in the back seat and fold his walker and put it in trunk. He'd lean against the back door and put his legs on the seat.

A few years ago I looked up Kelby on Facebook - he now appears to be in his late 20s - and he had written, "I can't walk."

He did have a lot of Facebook friends, many of whom were black women.

I have no idea if he has a job or lives on welfare. His parents lived in a small working-class house and I wonder if Kelby still lives there and will inherit it when his parents die.

Kelby was the weakest kid I have ever met in my life. Once when he was coming out of the school and heading toward my cab I said, "Come on, get a move on, Speed Racer," and he gave me a big grin and punched me in the stomach.

It was like being hit by a feather.

I once told a rowdy three-year-boy to punch me in the jaw. I never let him do it again. I estimate at three he was ten times stronger than Kelby.

Kelby had no friends at all. Once I was in the school waiting for him and he was talking to two boys. Kelby was basically begging them to come to his house to play, and they were both poker-faced and didn't answer him. I have never before or since since a kid beg like that. It was pitiful.

Once I picked up Kelby at home and he had a large knot on his forehead. I asked him what happened and he said he had rolled out of bed and hit his forehead on the wooden floor.

Once day I noticed Kelby was wearing a pentagram around his neck on a chain, underneath his shirt. I asked him what it meant and he told me, "I'm a pagan. We don't believe in God."

When I got him home I noticed for the first time the bundle on sticks on the front door - which I thought was some kind of decoration - was a pentagram.

I never said anything about it, it being none of my business. But I remember thinking, "What kind of parents raise a kid like that?"

I do remember that judging from the house, both his parents were working-class and didn't make much money. Let's just say they weren't any kind of intellectuals.

Kelby was actually a pretty smart kid and if he has a job it's got to be behind a desk. Did he go college? Does he have a car? A driver's license? Any friends, finally? Does he get around in a motorized wheelchair?

I only knew Kelby for about two months. One day after I took him home and was heading toward mine the tie-rod broke on my Chevy Caprice. By the time I got it fixed Kelby's ride had gone to another cab company and my company never got it back (this happened all the time, rides switching back and forth between companies).

I have no intention of ever contacting Kelby again. I'm sure he'd remember me but what exactly would I say?