Many years ago I read an article stating that any woman dating a man should ask his friends what he's like. I thought that was good advice, because men can see through other men very rapidly. Many women, on the other hand, can't see through men at all.
In my entire life I have never seen a woman ask another man what the man she is dating is really like.
In college I knew a guy, who was an acquaintance and not a friend, who I did not like. He never did anything to me, but I was getting red flags on him -- sort of an intuitive gut feeling.
He was a friend of a friend, though, so I got the story on him. He was the only guy I ever met who would go out of his way to manipulate and lie to women so he could have sex with them.
He'd target women who were less attractive than he was, lead to them to think he was their boyfriend, have sex with them for a few weeks, then dump them. He said he'd tell them "what they want to hear." He talked about marriage, lots of kids, having a home. It was all bullshit. He was the only guy in my life I've met who did this.
The women were always stunned. They had deluded themselves they were special. And I guarantee you that if my friend -- or I -- had told these women was this guy was really like, they would have never believed it. They would have thought we were trying to break them up, for whatever bizarre reason they could concoct in their fuzzy-minded heads. (I am reminded of an old Persian saying: Never come between a woman and her delusion.)
This guy was also a coward. A couple of guys once walked by him and a girlfriend. One said, "Your chick's ugly." The cad did nothing and kept walking. He said nothing
Many guys, although not all, will sleep with an available attractive woman, but they won't lead her to believe he's considering her for a serious long-term relationship. This guy did, dozens of times.
I've also met female versions of this man. He, and the women, have all ended up alone, unmarried, with no children. The women have cats as surrogate children. All of them have royally screwed up their lives, and I have no sympathy for them. How did this happen?
My experience has been excessively promiscuous people are narcissistic, i.e., self-centered, exploitative, manipulative and lacking in empathy. They're also irresponsible and cowards -- hence the phrase "selfish and irresponsible." They're very insecure inside, covered up with that Machiavellian narcissism.
They use people, don't know it, and in the long-run end up alone. All of them were the kind of people who had sex simply for their own enjoyment, with no concern for the other person. It was always about them only.
But why are so many people unable to see through them? In the case of women, who generally ruled by their feelings more than their reason, a manipulative, exploitative guy can connect with their feelings and thereby get them to connect with him.
The fact that so many women are ruled by their feelings and therefore irrational is why they traditionally have been denied the vote. It wasn't an oversight by the Founding Fathers. They did it on purpose.
Any parents with any sense, who have any understanding of their daughters, might look at them and tell them that girls tend to be more susceptible to their emotions and therefore might want to watch out for those charming, friendly, exploitative, manipulative types. If they don't listen...at least you tried.
In fact, Roissy's Ninth Commandment is "Connect with Her Emotions": "Set yourself apart from other men and connect with a woman’s emotional landscape. Her mind is an alien world..."
Sound sexist? Guess what? I don't care. The truth is the truth.
I remember only one girl saying anything bad about this guy. She said he had "a sneer on his face when he tried to smile." And it was true. That sneer was because, ultimately, I don't think he liked women. And the promiscuous women I knew, I think that they really didn't like men (the biggest red flag or this is "Men are responsible for all the problems in the world").
Women's blind spot is they are are ruled by their feelings, are not rational, and fall for a guy who can connect with their feelings, even if he is a lowlife.
Forewarned, as always, is forearmed.
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